INTER-PROVINCIAL NEWS.

Poverty Bay Herald, Volume VI, Issue 889, 13 September 1879, Page 2

INTER-PROVINCIAL NEWS.

The Chairman of the Tauranga Town Board seems to have nearly got into trouble for as upposed attempt to remove some obnoxious posts lately erected by that body. The local paper writes :— The dance had been a successful one, and early hours wefe fir advanced towards dawn ere the guests departed, our brave Captain, accompanied by two ladies, one on either arm, being about the last to leave. The lively Captain had perchance recalled his own boyhood days, or perchance his official duties weighed heavily upon him— by the result only can he be judged. Spring street traversed, the " posts" rose dimly m the morning light. Did he think to succeed where others had failed 1 Did he think he could elude the vigilance of the police, when younger men had been apprehended 1 We know not ; but this we do know, he left his two companions j alone on the far side of the road, and ''inspected" those posts himself. On dit — he tried the first, but it was too firmly fixed ; the second, it gave way a little. Would it come up ? No ! Yes ! No ! Had it been tampered with ? One more try, and — a heavy hand descended on his shoulder, whilst a hard gruff voice saluted him with — /'Just the man I wanted ! You come with me." Figure the alarm and consternation which took possession of the head and front of our local Board, on being suddenly seized by a strong limb of the law. He did not quail, however, but bravely stood his ground, and faced his captor proudly. After the lapse of a quarter of an hour, during which period representations and apologies had shown the matter m its true light, the Chairman was allowed to proceed homeward, happy m the thought that " all's well that ends well." Several amusing scenes were oocasioned at Tauranga on the day of the election, by a number of dogs parading the thoroughfares and decorated with election mottoes of their various owners. One large black fellow, ticketed " Vote for Morris," was unusually conspicuous, and both, on the Strand and m the Government Buildings waged deadly warfare with any of his canine friends who bore an opposition placard and had the misfortune to strike across his path. He was seldom defeated, and the byestanders cheered lustily, taking this as a good omen of success for their favourite. The Rev. J. Buller writes as follows to the New Zealand Wesleyan :" — " On the 27th ult. I heard Gough again. I was present at his first apparence m the Tabernacle, and I was there at the last. As soon as the doors were opened the spacious edifice was filled, although everyone had to pay from |one to three shillings. Sir Wilfred Lawson presided, and made a very good introductory speech of half an hour. But before he had done some signs of impatience were manifested. ' Gough was received with a mighty enthusiasm, the waving of handkerchiefs and hats and the great chorus of voices testifying to his popularity. He spoke for more than an hour, and with great effect, for he addresses the feelings more than the intellect, and he has great dramatic power. Yet on either occasion did he come up to my expectation. It must be due to my stupidity. He depicts the tremendous evils of drunkenness vividly ; but, as a temperance lecturer, I don't see what good is to be looked for while he does not turn to the classes who most need conviction. The great expense of bringing a lecturer front America, with large fees, renders it necessary to make a charge for admission to his lecturers, and this alone must keep away the drunkards. I think Gough feels this himself, for he said that he should like, before leaving England, to give some free lectures m such a place as the Seven Dials." A captain m a Militia regiment m Auckland several years ago, (say a contemporary) was very fond of lollies. One day, whilst m the quarter-master's office, he sent a man to the town for some toffy. Being a good sort of fellow, he divided it with the clerks m the room. They had their mouths full when who should come m but the Colonel. He asked the Captain a question, and the latter, instead of answering, merely started at his superior officer. The Colonel was astounded, and turning to the clerks, 'demanded an explanation, but all appeared m thesame'predicament. At last the Captain wrote on a piece of paper, "Can't speak if it was to save me from the gallows. " The Colonel thought they were all drunk, until at last the Captain, getting clear of his toffy, was able to explain the cause of the strange attack of dumbness. The gallant Colonel nearly burst his sides with laughter, and the incident was made to do duty on occasions at many a social gathering, where it was retailed with many an embellishment and addition. We (Telegraph) hear that the Waipawa nomination proceedings were decidedly lively. One of the interruptions Mr. Ormond received was an inquiry by one of his audience as follows : v You have told us a lot about what yon and your side can do better than the Grey party ; tell us something you think you can't do as well." Mr. Ormond replied, "We can't lie like them." There was no more interruption from that quarter. Among the accounts laid before the Hawkes Bay Education Board was one which startled the members considerably. It was from the professional gentlemen who surveyed three school sections m ,the bush. For each survey the charge was £4 4s ; for each plan £2 2s ; and for connecting the surveys with certain trigonometrical points, £3 3s. — total, £22 ]s, or a great deal more than the value of the land surveyed. The accout was referred to the Chief Surveyor, with a request to report upon the charges made. A ludicrous scene occurred at an auction sale being conducted by Mr. R. N. Hopkins, at Kawai Pass (says a contemporary), and might have had a serious termination only for the pluck

I and presence of mind digpSyed by the I auctioneer. A bull "Lord John," was sole occupant of one yard, and the auctioneer was going towards him backwards, describing him as an animal " capable of being led by his owner's smallest child." Ail at once the brute made a rush at him, Mr. Hopkins catch* ing him by the horns. A short struggle ensued and the bull tossed him towards the rails, which he mounted m a style that would have done credit to an acrobat. When safely perched on the top rail the auctioneer gave "Lord John" a pedigree (amid roars of laughter) wHch, however, does not appear m the No w Zealand Herd Book. Mr. Greenfield, one of the late Wellington candidates, does not bear the reputation of beiug a reading man ; and a Stotch elector is reported to have passed the following criticism upon him ; — "Eh, mon ! the dear fellow may be a | good timber merchant, but I diuna think he has read even ' ' Jock the I Giautkiller.' It would not be easy to put the matter m a stronger light.