MARRIAGE CUSTOMS OF LONG AGO.

Otago Witness, Issue 3040, 19 June 1912, Page 83

MARRIAGE CUSTOMS OF LONG AGO.

Many of our marriage customs arc relics of bygone days, and originated in the social and religious requirements of these times. Marriage by capture was a verycommon means of securing a bride, -and although the halo of romance and adventure surrounding the stealthy midnight flight and secret ceremony caused many who in reality had no cause for secrecy to adopt this plan, yet there waa often much hard fighting, as well as careful watching and guarding, to be done before the fugi; tive pair were safely united as man p*~wife. Thus it was that the bridegn. always endeavoured to engage the serv.' / of the most loyal, valiant, and strong flt his acquaintances as best man. In consequence of this rapid and hurrtod flight it was deemed advisable to spend the first month after the ceremony in seclusion, unknown to all relatives and friends, in order to give the parents time to cool their wrath and feel more kindly disposed towards the truants. This was the honeymoon—a very different marriage trip from our present-day holiday of peaceful bliss. The throwing of shoes after the bridal partv is a custom of very ancient»date. As far back as Scripture times wc learn that the passing of a shoe from one party to another was symbolic of the transference of authority :"so the father, by throwing a shoe after the bride, signified that henceforward he renounced his authority over her. Sometimes in the fight at the capture of the bride old shoes were thrown about when no more suitable missiles wero at hand. Akin to this was the old custom of trashing, practised amongst the lower classes of Scotland. Not only were old shoes-(and a rare collection of them wero often to hand) but pieces of turf, bog, and even dried mud, employed to pelt the wedding party; if they were unpopular it was gone about in an aggressive manner, but more often in a spirit of fun and lively good humour, with cheers and erpressions of good wishes. —Origin of Wedding Presents.— The nstom of giving presents to the bride dates back to primeval time?, when

it took the form of toll; her maidens and girl friends sarounded her dwelling and would not allow the bridegroom to enter to claim )is bride until he had paid toll in the fc rm of presents to each of them. In Scotland, when the contracting parties were in very poor circumstances, the guests helped to furnish their humble abode by giving them presents of household goods and chattels. A cart went round the week before the wedding and collected all the bulky articles, which were then arranged in the house by the young man and his mother or sister. The penny wedding waa another means of helping the young folk to start in life, free of debt and with a small surplus on hand. In some instances it was merely a subscription of a few pence from each guest to defray the cost of the festivities, for the marriage feast was a most important part of the ceremony, and it was considered an indignity to the bride not to give her a grand set off and a right royal “wedding spree.” When the entertainment was arranged on a more elaborate scale, the date of the wedding was announced in the public papers and in all the taverns for miles around; guests were solicited to attend for the benefit of the young couple, and a programme of sports, games of skill for prizes, and other amusements was drawn un and published weeks before the event took place. A barn or hall was secured to accommodate the party, often numbering from 100 to 2CO; and a jovial time they had, feasting, drinking, dancing, and singing till daybreak. The fiddler or piper was paid by voluntary contributions from the guests, and any one giving an extra copp*' or two during the night was allowed the privilege of choosing the tune. A very amusing old custom was the feetwashing. On the eve of the marriage all intimate friends and relations assembled at the house of the bride, and partook of refreshments and liberal notations of the “mountain dew.” A large tub, filled with warm water, was placed in the middle of the kitchen floor. In a merry, goodnatured frolic the bride’s shoes and stockings were pulled off and her feet plumped into the tub; around this the young folk scrambled, eager to assist in the washing and see who would be the first to find the ring, which had been dropped in from the finger of a married woman; first to catch the ring was to be first wed, according to an old belief. The mirth of the evening was finished nff with more refreshment, songs, and light-hearted jokes and fun. This custom was the survival of an old Scandinavian ceremony of religious purification called the bride’s bath. —The Home-coming.— It was considered unlucky for a newlymade wife to go direct to her new home after the ceremony; she must first break bread in her father’s house. In case she should stumble and fall when crossing the threshold of her future abode and so bring misfortune to her husband, it was the habit of the bridegroom to lift his bride right into the house. His mother then came forward and broke a cake of bread over the head of the young wife, thus giving her a welcome and signifying that want should never invade her dwelling. This bride-cake was not the elaborate triumph of the confectioners’ art with which we are to-day acquainted; it was merely a flat, round cake, resembling a bannock, or a form of Scotch shortbread. The young girls and maidens of the party gathered up the scattered fragments and carefully preserved them to place under theor pillows, a sa charm to enable them to see the face of their future husband in their dreams. “Running the braize” was a custom which provoked much mirth and rivalry amongst the young men. As soon as the bridal party left the church off the gallants set to run to the bride’s home an! declare the marriage accomplished ; a bowl of steaming brose, or bruize, with a liberal flavouring of the national drink, was the winner’s reward, besides the renown of being the swiftest runner of the party. As the following old song illustrates, there was always much manoeuvring on the part of the young men to give the first kiss to the newly-made wife—sometimes the clergyman entered into the spirit of the fun and forestalled them : It’s no’ very decent for 3-011 to bo kissing, It doesna’ look weel in tbo black coat ava'; ’Twould ha’o set ye far better to ha’o gi’en us yer blessing Than thus by such tricks to be breaking the law. “Dear Wattie,” quo’ Robin, “ 'tis just the an Id custom. An’ the thing that is common should ne'er ill bo ta’en. For where you are wrong, if ye hadna’ a’ wished him, You should have been first. It’s yerseT that’s to blame.’’ The throwing of rice, barley, wheat, ami other seeds upon the newly-married pair was symbolic of fertility and an abundance of worldly goods. The escorting of the young couple home about midnight was a lively part of thi proceedings, and then followed the quaint custom of throwing the stocking, as described in the old poem, “ Progress of Matrimony” : Then come all the young folks in, With ceremony throw the stocking. Backward o’er head in turn they tossed it, Till in each posset they had lost it. The intent of flinging thus the hose Is to hit him (the bridegroom) or her (tho bride) o’ the nose. Who hits the mark thus, o’er left shoulder, Must married be er© twelve months older. Liberal draughts of the bride ale were considered a necessary acompaniment to all these ceremonies. From this came the term bridal. As at present, bo in these olden May was considered an unlucky month for weddings. The reason for this can be traced to the old heathen custom of celebrating their greatest festivals on May Day; so unseemly were some of the practices at these observances that the Christian Church prohibited the whole of that month for formal and proper unions. The understood law that the younger should not bo preferred to the elder war not confined to Patriarchal times, as in

the casß of Jacob and Rachel; ft held gocd for many generations, and even yet there is a relic of it in the practice at country weddings of pulling off the 6hoes of the elder and causing him, or her, to trip in stockinged feet the first dance of the marriage festivities of the younger. —tit old national customs die hard, and in remote country districts and Highlands of Scotland many of these old practices, besides others equally quaint and interesting, are still in vogue at weddings.— Elissa Reid.