Little Bobby on Automobiles.

Otago Witness, Issue 2689, 27 September 1905, Page 80

Little Bobby on Automobiles.

Ottomobeels is the things "he rich peepls began to buy when thay found out that shop gurls and shipping olurks cud buy and lide bisikles, thay went & asked tho price and when hay learned that it v.as as high sumtifn.^3 as 30C0dol thay sed to thcmself Well, that will hold tho rabbel for awh'le.

if you want to 30 into society you have to git a ottomobeel & a shuffer to run it for you, then you have to go out into the country and tell the shuffer to give you tho front fiet & let you run it, & run over 2 farmers, 3 dogs, and 2 littel children, then foaks will tell eech other at tho country club that you are a ferelcss drivei who have faced deth a. thousand times.

jou can have- lots of jolly parties in ottorr.obeels, you can start from the summer resort & ride clear to sth Avcnoo & then a rain storm cums tip so you can't go back that nite, so you stay in town. JVhea you see, a ottornbeel going pjist

with a. bunoh of ladies & gentlemen you' will see that the ladies are waring vails & you thmk maybe it is to keep the wind! off, but maybe it is to keep the publick guessing- who they ara. " A ottomobeel is a grate thing for a chappie who wants to win the undying luv of a. chorus gurl. it is as eesy to win the undying luv of a chorus gurl as it is to win' all the munny in a rulette wheel bank, tho chappie meets her at a dinner party & h® saj'y What do you say to a jolly spin tomorrow in my new 30 horse-power turing. car, & she suya By ali means, so the noxti day lie taik3 her for a long rifle & buyshere lots of wino and dinner, then eh© says I MUST gib back to rehersel, & aftor tho show when he waits for her sho lseirff ihare, she has gone out to dinner with sum newspaper man that can talk abouti sum-thing besides gasoline, she doesn't earo if the chappie- is soar beekaus New York is full of "other chappies & they all have taring cars & trusting harts. sum me.i that own ottomobeels like- to race nth each other, this maiks it hard for the foaks that ar-s driving horses ok walking along^ the- road, bekaus when tbare is a chance to brake a record the snufferd ia the ottomcbeela doant like to lose tima dodging the common peeple, 1 never herd of but one man that was sorry he didentt dodge a fellow in the* road, he ran over, the fellow & tho fellow got tangled up in 1 tho gearing of the .jashean 1 & stopped: it & the race was lost. I hertf a society man talking the other; day to a ottomobeel deeler, he sod I wish*, you fellows wudont sell ottomobeels to/ prize- fighters & gamblers, it will maik therni common, those men are not in our get l^ Then, the deeler laffed & sed No, thay ara not in yufts set, tha-y buy better masheens & pay cash Zor them, & when -thay got - out riding thay throw munny to the kids; lusted of running over thena, thus creating' a sentiment in faiver of the masheen, if thought that was a pritty good cum back% i guess when the Angel Gabriel cums «f toots his horn all the society foaks that have ottos will toot thare otto horns backJ afc him but Gabriel will shaik his hod &=& = say No, i doant want you, git off t«he lmell