THE PREMIER AT NELSON.

Otago Witness, Issue 1161, 28 February 1874, Page 1

THE PREMIER AT NELSON.

Never, since Maavwoiui's avowal that "he liked to be persecuted," has the Christian grace of forbearance been ,so signally illustrated as by the good people of Nelson at the dinner given by them to the Premier. They went far beyond the injunction to turn the cheek to the smiter. They feasted him royally, flattered him, cheered him, and sent him on his way rejoicing.

It seems that it .suddenly dawned upon the inhabitants of Sleepy Hollow one morning that it would be a iine thing if some rivulet from the torrent of borrowed money that is being poured over the other Provinces were diverted towards Blind Bay. They accordingly resolved, with a unanimity that is touching from its very simplicity, that they would forthwith apply for leave to borrow a mere driblet — a quarter of a million or so. By a singular coincidence, which, of course, has no more logical connection with this notable scheme of theirs than Goodwin Sands have with Tenterden Steeple, the idea of inviting Mr Yogel to come to a dinner at Nelson, occurred to them at the same time. He came. Then the ISTelsonians did great things in his honour. Not only did they literally kill the fatted calf, they had a show fish of huge proportions, probably the only one of its inches in the Province. Him they sacrificed to their illustrious guest. As the Nelson Evening- Mail puts it, with pardonable pride — "a magnificent nine-pouniier trout, that had been caught in the Maitai in the morning, graced the board, and was probably the first fish of the kind that had been set before Mr Vogel in ; New Zealand ! " But our Premier was not to be baulked of his meditated vengeance by the stale and transparent device* of a mess of pottage. Trout was all very well, but allegiance to Vogel ism was a higher "and a holier thing-. These Nelsonians had been troublesome and disloyal folk in times past. Some of their members had wavered, some had presumed to take an independent line, a few had even dared to become open opponents. This kind of people must be duly snubbed and repressed when a convenient and safe opportunity offered itself, the laws of ordinary courtesy, and the delicate l-elations bet w eon h^st and guests notwithstanding. They might, be ultimately received into favour, but only after a considerable probationary period, and, in tho meantime their manifold faults and shortcomings must be very distinctly pointed o«L to them. Now, when a speaker prefaces his remarks by saying, that "though ho will not hurt the most tender feelings oi any one in the Province, ho intends to speak in a plain and candid manner," we know pretty well what to expect. The prayer to bo saved from '-the candid friend " is by no means a new one. Therefore, after congratulating his -victims, with a cruel kindness, upon their tardy repentance and conversion to a policy that he euphemistically described as " that of awakening the slumbering spirit of colonisation," the Premier showed himself a master of the art of ingeniously .tormenting, by putting an imaginary oase, in which he sought to show that if the Canterbury settlers had only come to Nelson, and the Nelsoniuns had only gone to Canterbury, their present respective positions would havo been reversed. This was indeed a. bitter pill for his hearers to swallow. We can fancy the poor people Jppkjng-

around at their narrbw riband of cultivable land at the bottom of Blind Bay, hemmed in by steep and barren hills, and mentally contrasting it with the broad expanse of the fertile Canterbury plains, which no conceivable mismanagement could have long rendered unprosperous — and then heroically eating their leek, and cheering their mentor, or tormentor. The enormous injustice of the comparison, to say nothing of its needlessness, is too obvious to require pointing out at length. When the conditions are so utterly dissimilar, comparisons are something more than odious — they are simply silly. The whole thing reminds us of David Copperfield's aunt, who was perpetually taunting her nephew with the (hypothetically) admirable behaviour of a sister of his, who had the misfortune never to be born. There was much more to the sam 6 purpose, all of which, we are informed, was not only endured, but rapturously applauded by these lineal descendants of the patient GriSELDA. The astute Premier had not miscalculated the ox-like * patience of his audience, and, with fine irony, told them that "it spoke well of his estimate of them that they had rather he should speak his mind frankly and freely to them than address empty compliments to them." It is true that he was good enough to say "That, with regard to the City of Nelson, apart from the Province, he had no fault to find." The handiwork of the Creator, in providing " a beautiful site and a delightful climate," was spoken of with unqualified approval. The good looks of the virgins of Nelson were also honoured by his commendations. But even then, dwelling on that softening theme, he could not resist adding that, "All, save the spirit of man, was divine " — a sentiment that the guileless men of Nelson appeared to applaud lustily. Had he but given Heber's parallel lines where he says of Africa, "That only man is vile," he would surely have brought down the house. Truly, practical Christianity is not extinct in these Isles of the South !