TRUTH TALKS

NZ Truth, Issue 985, 11 October 1924, Page 4

TRUTH TALKS

WBTH THE MAN AT TflE CORNER ON TOP2CS OF THE WEEK

The Man has been for a short tri has much to relate of his experi down. Travel has apparently I subject of women smoking he wj wasn't half so forbearing on th:

THE FRUITS OF HONESTY. "Hallo, you're looking sun-burned this morning, and we must say we notice that your usually immaculately kept clothing is somewhat dusty." "That is so, 'Truth,' your observations are correct. I've just arrived back from the garden city and brought some of its dust with me." " "Came over on the Maori, we suppose?"

"No such luck— had to do it on the Mararoa, but that .reminds me. I really must tell you a little 'story about something that happened when I arrived at Lyttelton on the *way down. A young fellow lost liis overcoat and got very upset. However, when all the passengers were seated m the ferry train awaiting departure for Christchurch and the pleasure of the trip through the tunnel, m l'ushed'a panting steward amongst the seated passengers brandishing the long lost overcoat and shouting for its owner whom he found at the far end of the carriage." "We'll bet the young fellow was pleased to get his coat back." "Too right .he was." "And we suppose he gave the worthy steward a handsome tip for his trouble and honesty!" "I thought he would too, 'Truth' — but he didn't. But I thought if ever he returns by the same steamer he'll be a brave man." A HARD ROAD. The Man was m a thoughtful mood as he sat m the office chair and watched the smoke from his pipe curl to the ceiling. Our repeated queries at last brought a reply. "I met a man the other day, 'Truth'," he said, "who earns three eighteen and six, and out of that has to pay a rent of thirty shillings and keep a wife and six kiddies. '■- I'm just trying to solve the riddle — how does he do it?" "Perhaps he's a mathematician of the first order and has worked everything, out to a, line point," we suggested mildly. "Not at all," the Man went on; "the chap to whom I'm referring -is an ordinary laborer. He's followed the advice of the plutocrats and kept the cradle full, but it about ends there, for he doesn't get enough from his job to bring them up decently." "It's a wonder he hasn't risen above the level of a laborer and forged ahead. He has the incentive." "You're all wrong, 'Truth.' We've got to have a certain amount of laborers — to do the hard and dirty work — but it seems to me, just because they're such, we expect them and their families to live on less than other men. The least that could be done for them, 'Truth,' is to see that the return for their labor is adequate and j us t — sufficient to enable them to make their home life decent and refining — that is where the uplift comes m, the incentive to do better." The Man paused as he eyed us sternly. "One- other thing," he finished, "and that is: compared with fifteen years ago, when wages for the laborer were not much smaller than they are now, and 'bread was sixpence for a double loaf milk 2%d a quart, and everything about half what it is now, who was the best off?" We told the Man we'd work it out and let him know later on m the week. TUNNEL TAIiK. "What do you think," said the Man, "they are going to duplicate the Lyttelton tunnel at last. Wonders will never cease!" "That story is covered m whiskers, we said. "We've heard about it ever since we were boys, and besides we really must consider Dr. Thacker's feelings." "I was thinking of the feelings of those poor blighters who are compelled to sit m that Lyttelton to Christchurch train on its weary way through that smoke hole after a rough trip on. the ferry boat."

"Yes, it does give one a fed-up feeling and the appearance of a smoked ham but there seems no way of getting out of the difficulty." "Well, I don't know, 'Truth.' I've heard it whispered that the motor traffic is becoming a very strong competitor with the railways throughout N.Z./ and that the Department will have to get a move on with this tunnel business or the other crowd will be running a road over the top of the hill and giving it a go." "Oh! We've heard of big ideas like that before, but they have never .come to anything." "Do you mean the tunnel idea or the road over the hill idea?" "Both of them," he said. THAT HAT. ' "Women are selfish creatures," mused the Man. • ■ "Say not so," we said gently. "Who is the flapper who has bitten you this time?" . "I went to the pictures last week," he said by way of explanation. "The place was packed to the doors,- and there was. only one seat left when 1 1 got there. I congratulated myself on ! my luck, when turning to look at the screen I saw that my view was blocked by a woman wearing an enormous hat. Politely I 1 leant over arid asked her to remove it. 'Certainly not,' she replied coldly.

" 'But, madam,' I ventured, 'it is im-j)ossiblo-to_eeo tho-screen,'

|P to the City of. the Plains and iences there and on the way broadened his views, for on the as unusually forbearing. He 2 matter of smoky tunnels.

"'I cannot remove it,' she snapped. •Very well, then,' I said, 'I shall have to (< fetch the manager! 1 "I was absolutely furious," said the Man, "as people nearby were enjoying 1 the scene, but J was determined that the woman should not have her own way. manager was polite, and couteously agreed that the woman, should be made to remove her hat, so he accompanied me down the aisle to where she was- erupting like a feminine Etna. " 'Do you mind removing your hat, madam,' he said suavely. 'Certainly not,' she snapped again. " 'Then I'm afraid that I shall have to ask you to leave the theatre,' the manager spoke m cold definite terms. " Tery well, I will,' she said viciously. She wrenched the hat off her head. And then she wondered why everyone laughed. For she had not only taken her hat off, but clinging to it was a large auburn wig which left her head as bare as. a billiard ball." x "And what happened then?" "She left the theatre," replied the Man, smiling grimly. . ■ ■ . BEER OR CHAMPAGNE OF LIFE. " 'A young man ought to save something on an income of £4 per week,"' snorted the Man, reading Sir Robert Stout's observation m the Wellington Supreme Court last week. ' "Yes, but that depends on whether the young man prefers beer or champagne," said our old cynic, the Man. We mentioned that the young man who had called forth this observation was .one who, according to his counsel, preferred the gay society of the affluent, the ballroom, and doubtless the juice of the grape to the malt and hops of the humble £ 4 a weeker. "Then what was he by occupation,'* asked the Man. 1 "A clerk," we said. Before we could say more the Man was launched on his favorite topic. "Oh, a clerk was he," he burbled. "There you are now. It's the same old tale over again. Why the deuce these young fellows don't become carpenters, or • bricklayers, or something tangible beats me. . Four pounds a week, ugh! It makes me ill. Had the fellow had a good trade he'd have been making £6 and living among people making £ 6 themselves. But no, young fellows will not do it. They must be clerks and go to work well dressed. On the streets they might be bank managers, their addrese and dress are alike impeccable, and as clothes make the man so they get taken up on face value among circles they've no business on a poor wage to be m." "Exactly," we said, "then they're led into temptation to keep up appearances far beyond £ 4 a week." "And what pleasure there can be m a life of pretence has got me beat," declared the Man finally.

AN ARID LAND

"It's been pretty hot and dry down m Canterbury for a few weeks past," reported the Man. "That's a fact!" "Yes, things m South Canterbury, especially, are 'Hot Stuff

with the lid off. I heard from a chap who had been knocking round that province that m one paddock alone he saw eleven dead heifers and that some of the hardest pushed cockies have gone as far as to offer the beasts which they are unable to feed to anybody who would take them' away." "That doesn't sound too bright for Canterbury." "I am also told that the late Clement Wragge warned Canterbury cockies to take p.otice that they would be m for a very dry spell towards the end of 1924 and the' early part of 25 — and that it is only those who took notice of what that gentleman said who are able to scratch up a bit of feed for their stock." "We have often thought that things will never be satisfactory so far as the equal distribution of moisture is concerned m New Zealand until Harry Holland and his party have control of such important matters." "You mean the Socialist idea — Halves Brother, Halves?" "Exactly," we* said. (But since the Man told us this awful story heavy rain has fallen over Canterbury). WOMEN SMOKERS. "You're a smoker, !Truth,' and your opinion on the matter ought to carry some weight." - The Man looked at his weed critically and then at us. ""What," we cried, "are you at a loss. to know which brand to smoke? We can recommend you a few we've tested. This, for instance," and we waved aloft the best m cigars, but the Man interrupted. "No, no; it's, nothing to do with the brands of tobacco, or a man smoking, either. I was going to refer to women smoking if you'd given me half a chance." ' "Sorry, old friend. We are all attention, so fire ahead; but mind, one question at' a .time please." "This question of women who, smoke, 'Truth.' Some maintain it's detrimental to the general health of the sex, spoils their complexions, makes them seedy and generally fit for the scrap heap. I " ■ - "We don't like to see the idea carried to excess, Man, but there's . no sei-ious harm m a cigarette occasionally." , . "Oh, yes! We all agree witu that, but. some of these killjoys who are always declaiming against women smoking would try and make one believe that women who smoke are no good, and if they smoke one cigarette they must necessarily be heavy smokers and always at - it. "F'instance, I w«as reading- the other day where someone said women who smoked were at it getting dressed m the morning, while they had breakfast, right through the morning, and m fact, that every meal of the <day was interspersed with whiffs at the fragrant weed." "Don't you believe it," we said "There may be a few "m some fast s_t who carry the habit to the extreme, but they are m a very small minority and don't count." •:.- "Arid," added the Man, "you can't tar 'em all._with. the same brush, if some- want to ruin their pretty features altogether— well, then, let .'em. t «2 t "