Proposals of Marriage.

New Zealand Mail, Issue 859, 17 August 1888, Page 5

Proposals of Marriage.

* In the spring a young man’s fancy lightly turns to thoughts of love.’ The plovers are busy laying eggs at 4d a piece ; the early country cousin has been seen in the Rovy ; aud east winds and Arctic cold have permanently set ia. From these unmistakab o signs I infer that Bpriug has begun, and I naturally therefore turn to tlio subject ot proposals. So long as matrimony continues to be regarded as a harmless aud necessary pursuit, bo long undoubtedly wi 1 men ami womon—especially the latter—propose to each other. Daring the three forthcoming months, many will be tempted to commit matrimony, and it is for the benefit of these that I offer the following suggestions The late Charles Dickena has immortalised the clumsy eccentricities of a certain Mr Barkis, who ingenuously compromised himself with a lady of the name of Peggotty by scrib* bllug up ‘ Barkis is willing.’ What this method Jacks in romance it makes up for in

brevity. The charming proposal of Soapy Sponge to Lucy Glitters possesses all the fteshness of health aud maiiliness } the fatal encounter between Unole Toby and Widow Wadman affords an instance of inborn innocence aud chivalry; whilst Sam Weller’s rough-and-ready courtship with the pretty housemaid admirably exemplifies the jauntineßS of area-life.

The most characteristic proposal on record is attributed to William ti;e Conqueror, who simplf evercamo the lady’s objection by thrashing her into compliance. VVhatever superficial advantages this course may present I scarcely feel justified in recommending it for general adoption. It is perhaps a trifle too aggressive. William the Conqueror was notoriously a man of deeds aud not of words. There is one form of proposal which is eminently satisfactory-^that is the one which ia made with an absolute oertainty of its being accepted by the lady, and rejected by her parents. This is the one sacred privilege of the Detrimental. It causes the greatest annoyance possible to everyone concerned, with the exception of the individual who makes the offer ; and, if for this reason alone, I particularly recommend it. A girl has been defined as * sixteen yards of stuff with a woman inside.’ It is a curious fact that in countries such as Turkey and Persia, where the men clothe themselves most, the status of women is considerably inferior, whilst in Europe, where the reverse is the custom, her position is proportionately superior. From this it would appear that, if clothes do not make the man, they undoubtedly do make the women. At 20 we love every woman we meet; at 25 wo become somewhat more discriminating ; at 30 we seek for wealth and beauty combined ; and at 40 we require an angel, a goddess, and a millionaire all rolled into one. Marriage is like a oold bath—the longer you hesitate, the less you will like it. Matrimony is the tomb of love, and a second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.—Vanity Fair.