SHORT WAR STORIES.

New Zealand Herald, Volume LII, Issue 15948, 19 June 1915, Page 5 (Supplement)

SHORT WAR STORIES.

UNUSUAL. s A British officer • inspecting sentries guarding the line in Flanders came across a raw-looking yeoman. •, : 'X. ■, " What are you here for !" he asked. "To report anything unusual, sir." "What would you call unusual?" " I dunno exactly, sir." -•*'/ "What would you do if you saw fire battleships' steaming across* 1 that field yonder!" % ; r-, X " Sign the pledge; sir." . . .UT-

'•it- ' RINGS FROM. A SHELL. » | A gallant French officer, . whose home is 1 in England, has just -Sent a unique : little present from the front to his wife,- and it is a gift die treasures dearly. Recently "■ a German shell burst near 'him, and from a fragment of the projectile hi> had two rings ; fashioned. One of the rings _ho " sent •to his wife and the 1 other he wears > himself. Both; rings, which are of a dull, silver-like metal; are made exactly alike, and have inscribed on them the name of. the. place 'and the! date on J which the incident happened.; &<* ■ |

: ONE FOR GERMAN COLONEL. . "v! '■.. ■t f ■ . I Among the German prisoners at Chateauneuf/ is a colonel who is ■> getting on id years. He; was wounded, ; but 'not seriously enough to be repatriated. But he has ha 4 enough of the war. The other day, when he came up for inspection, he said : " I'm sixty-two, my " heart is ; bad and I have' been wounded in the arm. I am unfit for further military" service, and I should like to go back to my. wife and children." But the French officer replied : " General Pau has only One arm,, he .is seventy years of age and* he is still serving his country."

. | LAST SHOT 'AT THE FOE. y A physician found a soldier lying with a bullet wound through his head after, an unsuccessful German charge. When, the physician tried to make the soldier com-

fortable, tlie latter said, "For God'ssake, doctor, give me one more! cut at those devils. Don't fuss with me until I've had one more shot at' them 1" The soldier had been blinded by his wound. " Where aro they doctor! What's the range?" asked the man;' Six hundred yards," said'the doctor; to humour the man. " Fix my rifle sight for me," ordered the soldier. The doctor did as ordered, and the blind soldier fined it in the direction of the Germans. Then he sank back and was dead •within a few minutes. THE TURKISH ADMIRAL. The Turkish navy is said to be at present entirely under German control, which is well for the Turks if their admirals of to-day are anything like the one Lord Carlisle met when lie visited

Constantinople in 1854. This particular admiral's ignorance of naval matters was equalled only by his horror of the sea. If he went for a cruise he was invariably sea-sick. 1

On one occasion, when prostrated in his cabin, hearing a noife which grated on his nerves, he inquired whence it proceeded. "From the rudder of the ship," was the reply. " Then have the rudder removed, immediately," ordered the afflicted admiral. HIS MISTAKE. He had been a riveter in one of the shipyards, and was used to tho din and roar of the thousands of hammers used in connection therewith, which causes deafness to many of the men engaged in this occupation. When the call of King and country sounded he nobly responded and enlisted, and was eventually drafted to the front. It happened that the first of his nights near the scene of action was supremely quiet, but just before daylight the enemy's guns came into action, and the boom and roar of the "Jack Johnsons." etc., woke him with a start, and he gazed round the unusual surroundings of his billet. "What's wrong, mate?" asked one of the old hands, seeing the expression on his face, "did you think the world was comin' to an end?" " No," was the reply, " but I thought I had slept in. and they had started work without me." TERRIBLE HEROES. Two little Scottish children were boasting fbout their respective soldier fathers. My father's a soger," said one little girl. " "My father's a soger, lae," retorted the other.

"Av, but my father's a brave man, a terrible brave man," persisted the other. " He's been in a war. an' bo's got medals, a terrible lot of medals, an' he's got the Victory Cross and the King fastened it on wi' his ain hand!"

" But my father's a braver man than yours," said the other, sticking up valiantly for the honour of the family. "And lie's been in a lot of war, and lie's got dizzeiw and dizzens of medals and Victory Crosses, and lie's got a wudden leg that the King nailed on wi' his ain ban'." i