ALL SORTS PEOPLE

Free Lance, Volume II, Issue 92, 5 April 1902, Page 3

ALL SORTS PEOPLE

WE caught Mi. Maicus Marks, the .stalwart supeivisoi" of the G-overnmeut Printing Office in a remimscent mood last week, and persuaded him to think up his daredevil schoolboy days of thirtj years ago. Mr. Marks was observed to say at the lecent ' farewell" to Mr. Mow bray, headmaster of Thorndon School, that he had had more thrashings to the square inch during those said earl\ days than anj ot his schoolmates. Consequent^ , he must have been one of the makeis of school lu&torv m that distant era * * * When joung Maicus hist went to school at Thorndon, the seat of learning w-as a Church of Kngland one and Mr. Mowbra\ was ti\mg to m.stil some knowledge into the most pnatical lot of juvenile miscreants who ever budded forth into estimable citizens with tales to tell. Manv of the mi Id-man neied and 'solid" gentlemen who now lead exemplary lives, and who attended Mr. Mowbray's farewell are the self-same bad bovs of those good old davs". Manv a time and oft did thev m school hours slide down the bank leading to the Government Printing Office (where now stands Searl's Hotel) and go in swimming off Brown's Wharf which was close handv to that institution Manv a healthy composition ink-roller did thev nobble from the Government pnnterv, and parcel out for chewing purposes. » ♦ • Marcus as he tells the jam grins to show us the quality of his dentuie He attributes the perfection of old Thorndon School boys' teeth to much masticating of Government punting rollers. And that was how he developed a taste for the printing trade All these old Thorndon bovs can swim In off tames the bovs used to live an amphibious life in what is now Lambton Quay. Stein battles took place between the hosts of 'Dicky" Holmes (Te Aro 1 ) and Mi Mowbiav's ' invincibles." Over the lower pait of Sydney-street those Thorndon bovs held autocratic swav. and life in Dr Grace's house was not exactly Arcadian in consequence • » * Kven the police (who had been bovs themselves) weie powerless and the comma- strong men of the colom needed all the collection that Mi Mowbrav could give pei medium of the best of supplejacks. Marcus lemembers with exultation the excursions bold youngsters made between the ceilings and roofs of the old school of disturbed Fiench classes of wend and unearthly voices fiom abo\ e of bo\ish devilries, and the aftermath— the Moubia\ ami and the Mowbra\ supplejack Turn the Rontigen ra\s on an\ of it. " saiys Maicus "and there disco\ er the old trademark a suppleiaek rampant'" * * • And vet Thomdon bo\^ could win scholarships easier and oftener than thoso of am other school Of the earhei ' scholarship bovs," Adrian Greville. now a Government surveyor, was one 'Bill" Callaghan. in the Postal Department, was another Joe Ludwig a lively bov and a srood scholar "Keirv" Webb whose brother is now acting headmaster of fhe old school and the mischievous Marcus Marks himself. * • * Other mischievous bovs of anothei period but who throve under that same supplejack, are Clapham accountant, Public Works Department Selig. now

managei Caiiteibim lime's . Kirkoi , maiuigei South Butish In&uiancc t omnn M i> , Hauj and Theo Marks, brothois ot the much-chastised Marcus, who aie thmmg biokeis on the Melbourne Stock Kxchauge. Then, latei came 'Tom" Bainett, the present-clav Dunedin doctor, who was celebiated foi his wharf mud pills. 'Mick" Barnett. now officer in change of the Public Trust office C'lnistcliurcli aad who was mo«-t celebrated m his school da\s for taking all the available maibles in trust 'for his own sole u«e and benefit." and 'Sid" Smith, the bo\ who never took a beating and who wouldn't surrender 'to a bally Dutchman" a few weeks since and was <-liot for Ins losolution m Africa ♦ * * Charlie" Skeuett tned to aigue with Mi. Mowbia\ m his youthful davs He was for the defence then as now but the stiong aim 1 found a concealed boaid m the budding law\ei's pants, and it was. not well ".\rth him C'haihe" Earle now sporting editor of the Christchuich "Weekh Pi ess," was m those fai-ofF days fond of giving spoiting tins to the Thorndon boys, and he had a, few ' dead certs " up his sleeve, w Inch howe\er, weie scant protection Mr. Mow bra v taught the mother of the singing Parsonses, and in due time the piesent tuneful generation as well. There is only one Thomdon schoolboy who has been be-kiughted — Sir Kenneth Douglas. * * * Mr Von Zedhtz, the new Professor of Languages at the Victona College bears a name that one would exnect to find coupled with an accent fiom the Fatherland. This massive, athleticlookincr Dominie, however, is perfecth acquainted with the use ot English, and indeed he should be Piofessoi Von Zedhtz left the Fatherland while still vouna his mother is an English ladv and he has spent nearly the w hole of his scholastic career in Great Britain. His father — an officer of high rank in the German Anm — had mapped out an Army caieer for his son but fate was against it On the death of his father, young Von Zedhtz went to Fngland with his mother and he got a piettv complete training in football, cricket, and field sports generally at Wellington College Reading wheie the English officer is piepaied for the big military schools of Sandhurst and Woolwich The futuie Professor however, studied so closely, and bored so deep in languages ancient and modern that his eyesight became weak, and he eventually decided to go in for a scholastic caieei He entered at Trimt\ College Oxford w as a scholar at that celebrated seat of learning and took his clegiee. * * •* He wicstled \ei\ successfulK with languages there and the rathei stern mouth ot the new Professoi looks as if it had assumed its present set expiession from saMng haid words He carne>s his pince-nez in his hand, but the bridge of the professorial nos>e is deeply lined at the place wheie those implements grip, showing their fiequent use. Six years at Loretto School near Edinburgh as form master, gave Mr. Von Zedhtz his expenence as a schoolmaster The Professor says that the principal of that school has very advanced ideas as to physical education, and that, as a consequence the boys go forth into the world fully able to grapple physically and educationally with anything that turns up He i<~ himself a fine example of the success of the system ♦ * * Asked if New Zealand was attracting much attention at Home Mi Von Zedhtz savs distinctly yes — that our progiessiven/ess. our politics, our scenic beauties are discussed more than that of all the Australian States combined. He intended, had he not obtained the posi-

tiou he now holds, to come to New Zealand with a pai-ty to stait a picpaiatoi\ school for boys who were intended foi the English Universities He made piehmmary arrangements two \eais ago, but they fell through when he accepted lus present position Ho hasn't sampled a Wellington wind vet but he believes lie has wrestled with harder thinas than a southerly buster " It must be \ ery comforting to bo able to vituperate in six or seven languages when a zephvi strikes the Empire City, aaid we believe that Piofessor Von Zedhtz is the onlv citizen at nresent m Wellington who is capable of doing so * r * The Rev J. G. Grecnhough who came out on the usual lecturing tour of the colonies a,bout a vear ago, is home again if his article in the London Christian World," of February 6th, is to be believed He ca,lls it "Experiments in Socialism," and it has thirteen subheadings. That old unlucky number 1 Ho adimics "Dick," who has risen from the ranks "by sheer force of character," but he hints that "Dick" is the first step to New Zealand's ruin. His picturesque sub-headings lead one to imagine that this is the country, Dick is the man, and that we are the people . "Kins; Dick, the New Zealand Dictator — His Abilities and His Reforms," reads all right, until one comes down to "A Bad Time Coming — Discouraging Thrift — A Working Man's — (or a Fool's") — Paradise ? " * * ■» Then, the reverend critic get-s to work in two columns of sifted praise and veiled sarcasm, and the "Christian World" readers who are very many, will prohablv unpack their swaers when they read Mr Greemhough. He thinks that the dictation of trades unions, without reeard to the law of supply and demand, is going to hurrv on the hard times. He thinks old age pensions penalise thrift and that New Zealand will have to -pass through a time of suffering before it leanis wisdom, and much more on the samo linens Shortly, that we are a community of fools' * * * Fact is, that Mr. Greenhough is an Englishman with decidedly fixed views a.s to workers and then place. He behe\ es because the New Zealande>rs are having a better time than the Englishmen that it cannot last long, having 117 precedent.. Anyhow, his views make very mteiesting reading to the 100,000 subscribers to the ' Christian World." Naturally he knows all about our institutions, having been with us for a couple of w oeks Probably, he took home a few files of papeis of the wrong colour to read up in lus spare time. Trooper Cioss, the man who did the "lions" of England and the Continent after having done Africa, turned up m Wellington the other day, with a wider experience of his fellow-man than he had tw o years ago when he left New Zealand. Cross belonged to the Third Contingent, and had the luck, when his fighting was done, to get a troopship bound to England. Cross tells us that he was at Durban when the officer, foi the saving of w hose life from drow nmg Dick Cholmondeley got the Royal Humane Society's silver medal, was in the water Cross dived in, swam out to the drowning man, and brought him into shallow water, where Sergeant Cholmondelev picked him up It was pre\ louslv understood to have been a oneman lescue. * » * Cross is at present endeavouring to find out whether the Defence Office ow es him anything for his services. There appears to be a delightful sta,te of vagueness about it, but probably the ' Office" knows He thought it important enough to make a special trip from Christchurch. Couldn't he have written ° A letter would have the same effect. Takes time, you know'

Chief Health Officer Mason, who has just leturned from a trip to the Comconwoalfch, where he enjoyed himself looking into plague spots, is a difficult man to catch. He came back to Wellington, glanced into his office, saw a four-foot stack of papers waiting also "to be looked into," and has been closelv peering into them pretty constantly ever since If you can satisfy the Doctor that vou don't want more than five minutes of his time he will talk about Sydney and plague and microbes in such a wav as to make even those topics interesting. Did he notice a gleam of humour about plague matters over the "other side?" Well, yes, he thought the funniest thing he had noticed in that connection was the immense oare the authorities took to prevent sea-go-ing passengers from plague-infected Sydney taking the disease elsewhere, and the authorities' beautiful equanimity in allowing passengers to go across country from Sydney to Melbourne without anv precautions at all ' # • # However, as Dr Mason points out, one plague patient does not infect another human being by contact. In nearly all cases the festive rat is tihe vehicle of infection, and the only method of killing the plague is to kill the rat. At the plague hospital at Little Bay, where also is the lazarette, the patients are visited by their friends without any precautions being observed. A Church of England parson a,nd a Catholic priest live in the hospital, ready for emergencies "Rather cool of you," said Dr. Mason, to the genial priest, "to openly wait for burials, isn't it?" "Sure, me occupation's gone mtoirely," quoth Father O'Sheen. "Nobody's dying much lately and it's marrying them I'll have to be if I want to keep me billet." * * • The plague is costing an immense amount of money, says the Doctor. An infected area is immediately seized by the authorities, the inhabitants turned out, and the rats hunted to their lairs. From a business point of view only the situation is very serious. Talking about that unpleasant subject, disease, a gentleman who recently visited the lazareifcte at Little Bay, tells of apathetic case of leprosy A Sydney butcher, in a thriving way of business, well-liked, steady, and respectable, with a wife and two children, developed an ordinary pimple on the nose. It became rather annoying, and his wife persuaded him to so to the hospital. That is the last time she saw him as a free man ' Suddenly without warning, he was cut off from the delights of his home to slowly rot away, a loathsome fetid leper ' ♦ • • Aheady, his one-time rubicund, healthy face is shapelessly hideous, his throat is affected, and he speaks in whispers, and with difficulty, and he is surely, slowly, horribly creeping on to a feiarful and undeserved doom. His one consolation is that his two children., whom he may ne\er approach, are healthy, and his one prayer that his disease may be rapid in its course. * ♦ # Another case at the lazarette is in marked contrast. A powerful, burly ma,n, with brute instincts predominating. Foaming, cursing, ever on the move, declaring that he is perfectly well in health, but still a leper' One day this leper broke bounds, and went out on the spree. He found an hotel, and proceeded to make the most of his time. To account for his dark, diseasedyed complexion, he said he was a Maori, he took charge of the bar, dispensed dnnk with a free hand, and had a glorious time ' It leaked out that he was from Little Bay, and he thenceforth had the hotel to himself. When he had sufficiently quenched hi® thirst, he went back like a lamb to the lazarette, and the only other journey he will ever make thence will be to the cemetery.

Inspector Petei Pender, after a busy 6trenuous and honourable career of fifty-six years in the Police Force, at \arious parts of the Empire, has closed his volume of service, resumed the mufti of Chilian life, and is trying for once in a lifetime to indulge himself in the novelty of leisure. On Saturday last, at the age of over seventy-three, but with the vigour of a young man still in his gait and actions, he handed over the inspect orship of the Wellington district to his successor (Inspector Ellison) aind leaves him a splendid record to emulate Peter Pender was a Wexford bov, and, as his father died when he was five years old, he wasn't troubled A^ith much schooling, but had to start out and fend for himself as soon as he was able. And. being over six feet hieh a,nd a broth of a bhov at that, a police uniform fitted him to a nicety when he ioined the Irish police at the age of seventeen That was m December, 1845. * * * In the Crimean War he served on Lord Raglan's mounted staif corps, and was present at the fall of Sebastopo l. In 1856, lie left for the Victorian golddiggings (then at the zenith of their fame) helped to quell a mutiny on the voyage out, "swagged" it to the Ovens, uhere he presented a letter of introduction to Police Superintendent Robert O'Hara Burke, and by him was induced to join the Victorian police Burke .subsequently became the famous explorer. » » From July, 1802, Mr. Pendei's caieer belongs to New Zealand. He gave up charge of the Yackandandah station (where he was succeeded by Sergt. Steed, who arrested Bushranger Ned Kellv) m order to accept a tempting offer to assist in organising a police force for Canterbury. Three other members of the Victorian force accompanied him, one of them being Mr. Shearman, who was afterwards Superintendent of Police at Wellington. Mr. Pender lomed in Chnstchurch. with the rank of sergeant, but in less than two years he was inspector and in that position remained at Chnstchurch from 1862 to 1874. Thence till 1882, he had charge of Timaru, and during his time there the celebrated Timaru sectarian riots took place which Tom Bracken described with great gusto in his humorous verse as "The Sayge ov Timmyroo." They were caused by a march-out of the Orangemen, and led to a force of fifty A.C. men being sent down from Wellington. From October 1882 till January. 1893, Insnector Pender again controlled police affairs at Christchurch, and since then he has tortped all lecords a^ Police Inspector in Wellington. * • • Inspector Pender has had the conduct of many notable cases during his career m tins colony. One of the earliest murders with which he had to deal was that of Maggie Burke, a domestic in the household of the Hon. Mr. Robinson, at Park Terrace, Christchurch. She was the victim of a South American, who was employed about Mr. Robinson's stables. Then there was the famous Severed Hand mystery. A mechanic insured his life in two offices and went down to Sumner, where his clothes v.ere found on the rocks, and the report went abroad that he had been drowned while bathing. His widow, of course, claimed the insurance monev, but the companies, naturally enough, waited for the body to turn up. Then a strange thing happened, as they say in the story books. One day a man walking along the beach near Taylor's Mistake found a human hand, bearnig on one finger a line which was identified afc tne missing mechanic's

Bv this tame, certain suspicious circumstances had come to light. And, to make a long storv shoit, the deai lamented and much-insuied individual w a.s anesited at Petone. As for the hand, it was believed to be that of a Maon woman's, which he had procured at Masterton. Inspector Fender's first execution was that of a man who carried on w ith a partner a fruiterer's business in Market Square, Christchurch. He was convicted of setting nre to the premises, and burning his partner to death. Here, in Wellington, Mr Pender has had some very sensationaJ cases to cope with. For instance, the Bosher murder case at Petone, the SiJverstreaan murder case, and many others which run the whole gamut of crime. * ♦ ♦ No police official ever carried out his duties with less of red tape and more bonhomie. He was never a martinet, never forgot he was a citizen as well as a policeman, but when the occasion demanded it there was always the iron ha.nd beneath the velvet glove. Inspector Pender retires from the force without havine made a single enemv. He has been singled out for the snecial kudos of the Chief Justice and the Grand Jury and the public are now recording their appreciation in the solid and convincing form of sovereigns. • • • Inspector Ellison can't be as young as he looks, but the rathei stein-looking face of Wellington's nev\ police chief seems to indicate that he has a good thirty years of police life befoie him. He looked pitvmgh at the Lance man who a^ked him what country he hailed from. He savs Donegal, wherever that is. and his people were in the farming industry. So was the budding inspector. He left Donegal, which we ha,ve since discovered is in Ireland, over thirty years ago, and drifted to New Zealand, donning the 'blue" in 1872 His career of "crime'' has extended over a good many parts of New Zealand and many veaxs a"o he sat in the same office he now takes charge of as a police clerk, with Sub-Inspector O'Donovan working then as now, under him. ♦ * » For the last two yeais, he has been in Canterbury, doing his best to keep the gaols empty, and before that he w as Inspector on the wild West Coast, where the people think bi°; things of him. As sergeant in charge at Wanganui, previous to his Coast experience, he did several smart things which he doesn't want mentioned, and he knows something of the Queen Cltv, having helped to keerj the peace up there for six years. He wouldn't quite fill Mr. Pender's uniform, but he is one of those medium-sized men as hard as pin-wire, who would strip big and fit. He is not much given to ''fluting," but he smiles a smile that tells you he ha%s a host of anecdote stow ed away beneath that frogged tunic of his. Someday, when he has five minutes to spare, hie may be pressed into service for the Laxce columns. ♦ * * Captain Niesdgh, the private secretary of the Australian Federal Commandant, is an. ex-newspaper man. A few years ago he w T as a reporter on the staff of the Sydney ''Evening News." You can't keep these pushing pressmen back m the struggle of life. If they don't always get the front seats — well, they are m the immediate neighbourhood

The Hon. Capt. Baillie, the most \enerable figure in the New Zealand House of Lords just now, was presented the other day by the Marlborough fcchool teachers with a beautiful marble clock on his retimement from the Board of Education. In his leply, the old soldier said he ideally thought he would rather fight his battles over again, and face the Sikhs, than his friends that day. He recalled the fact that he came to Marlborough in 1857, that in 1808 Mrs. Baillie opened a school in their own house, one or two days a week, for the education of the sefctlers' children in, the neighbourhood, and that he himself acted in those earlv davs as first Inspector of Schools m Marlborough. He was supermtendtendent of the province in 1861, and for fortv years he had been connected with Marlborough Boards of Education. He could not see the clock (the veteran is almost blind\ but it would alwavs speak to hii heart. * «■ * Anything representative of New Zealand ls sure of a big time in England. Everybody knows what sort of a holiday a representative football team gets in the tight little isle. Just now our Bisley team is hugging itself at the thoughts of leceptions and victories, every Contingenter is aching to get included in the coronation detachment, and already the word is going round that a New Zealand lepre^entative band will tootle for English folks shortly. Bandmaster Herd, the Wellington Garrison Band leader, has been asked by Mr. J. Cope, editor of the London "Champion Journal," an organ devoted to band matters), to get together a band to go to England to meet the big bands from Dan Godfrey's Grenadiers downwards. If Mr. Herd has the picking, depend on it those bands at Home will have to look to their Fs and Gs. Bv the way, it mav relieve the anxiety of the smallbov population to state that it is definitely decided that Piccolo Charlie will not be included. * ■* # Captain Stapleton Caulton, who was so badh wounded while fighting with the gallant Seventh, once owned a racehorse called Porangi Potae (Maori for Madcap). After stacking to the noble animal for months, with varying success, and funds, as generally happens to a follower of the sport, getting very, verv low, Caulton, pluckv to the last, made one bold bid for a country club cup, and put the last of his monev on. However, the venture failed, Porangi finishing third. The owner sierhed, turned on his heel, and remarked, "It's mvself, and not the horse, that should carry a name like that." * * * The Native Minister (Hon. Mi. Car10II) when he sees a, batch of Maori warriors spoiling for a dance, simply has to fOlf 01 get he has been invited to live at the Prince of Wales's castle, and gives himseilf up to the abandonment of hakas, and portfolios and suchlike fade from his mental vision. Recently, on the East Coast, when some Maoris at a meeting started in to yell and dance, Timi" threw off his coat, hat, and w aistcoat, and waded right in with the wildest of these warriors. Those of us who know the restful "Timi" can hardly believe that he could jump four or five feet in the air in his shirt sleeves. The Minister would dra;v a big ladies' gallery if he could only be persuaded toreproduce his 'turn" during the session.