It Was Never Told.
Six or eight of us had lighted our cigars in the smoking ear when a man whom anybody would have sized up as an eastern drummer began to ivackle and chuckle, and finally exclaimed :
" I think it was the funniest thing I ever heard in all my life—ha. ha, ha !"
" Sir, are you a drummer ?" inquired an oldish man with reddish-gray hair, who sat in front of him. " Yes." " Drummer from New York ?" " Yes." "And you want to tell us a funny storv, ell '.'"
" I do. h's ilic funniest story I ever heard related, and too good to keep." " Well, sir, I've a word to say to you." continued the old man. " 1 like fun my self. Up to a year ago I was always on the grin. If anything tickled uie. I'd laugh till I fell down from weak uess. I once laughed thirteen hours without a break at a .story a drummer lohl me. I broughl on heart disease from laughing, and the doctors have warned me to be very careful. This story is mighty fiinnv, is it V"
" li is. sir." " I Jul a maritig old climax to it ?" " Ves." " I'tvin certain to coiivmlsc tin audience, I suppose V" "I'll wai rant ii to."
" Then please exciiMc me, and I'll sr.i int.> file nexl car for a few minutes. I'm certain it's a runny story. 1 know you'll tell ii in such a way that I shall have to I him l right mil in spite of all I can tin. If 1 luist, I'm a goner. I want to hear the story mighty had, hut I also want i" live as lon- as I can. .fust excll.se me." He picked up his -rip and left the car. and the drummer's smile faded away, and lie pulled mi; a newspaper and began to read. Somehow we didn't like to ask for the story, and somehow he didn't seem to care about telling it. Hy and by I went into the other ear and found the old man. and asked : " Were ynii really honest in what you said about your heart '.'" "Well, no," he replied. " What was your object ?" "Simply to stop his yarn. I'm travel ling in the .same line of goods for a i 'hicago house, and I wanted to hurl his feelings as much as 1 could." "M. Quad."
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Bibliographic details
Lake Wakatip Mail, Issue 2279, 22 September 1899, Page 6
Word Count
398It Was Never Told. Lake Wakatip Mail, Issue 2279, 22 September 1899, Page 6
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