TIMARU TALK.

Lyttelton Times, Volume LXII, Issue 7411, 29 November 1884, Page 5

TIMARU TALK.

[FttoM ot»n oww iviMarspovnßWT.] ,W- biwirn enniumrhiiur. I thought the «t«r»|y Presbyterian motto wn* going to U* fal<itfle<! fh« other night wh*.n the«trnw packed in the oM vo*try caught fire Tim plain atom* building, with the hard wiata and tlm r,,fd Inferior (that n*<>d to do duty before the little Madelatnn of Barnard »treef, waa built, adjacent to it) stood the flames bravely, but the interior certainly looks difttual enough now, since the devouring and lh« deluging elements hod their way with it. The police have investigated the matter, an l have otislied thcri}«*lvr* that thn lire *>; . ,iu»ed by «-.me youths who, after to» in the adjoining hall (wlmrn the Oddfellows u-re hobling their nntitversary festival) retired under the dark lee of the vestry to ftiti-ke. H our ymirigfttors must smoke, I don’t »ee liriw we are to prevent them ; but I do think w« ought to find a menus of (■urldng the pr«pen*ity of the New Zealand youth to threw lighted matches about. You never see one who ho* dwelt in the bfirh of Australia commit any such wantotiness i but in New Zealand it s«rra» to Is* unite the thing. I would make it a misdemeanour to throw lighted matches iilxnit,

Home time ago, it will In: remembered, f drew attention to the absurdity, yearly perpetuated, of electing, from among the members of the Mechanics’ Institute, a "patron.” Pairnmu for this year was elected in his absence, and I think he Is just the Inst man in the world to appreciate the questionable honour. I was not at tho annual meeting the other night, but I tears with satisfaction that the good seed I •owed a while ago has borne fruit, and that one Intelligent member intends moving for the abolition of the sinecure. Yet, such a hatred of innovations have some respectable fossils, that the motion is likely to be opposed as a revolutionary innovation! I am pleased to learn from a most reliable source (1) that the Dooley-Edge rifle* are a peerless weapon { (2) that they were imported at the smallest possible cost, and sold to members of the Eille Club on the beat terms j and (81 that tho ammunition was allocated with impartiality. Complaints had reached me that these conditions had not been fulfilled, but that tho rifles had been charged for at an excessive rate, and the ammunition allocated with extreme partiality; and I am glad to learn that these complaints were groundless. Last Monday night the Indefatigable Councillor Sutter was in his seat at the Municipal Board—the terror of evil-doers and the support of the weak-minded. I prophesied there would be “ ruction*,” and by a curious coincidence the return of the venerable Captain was simultaneous with the temporary collapse of two" Councillors. One was presented by head-ache and the other by stomach-ache from being present that night. I fear It was the prospect of on encounter that worked all the mischief.

The tireless energy of the man! No sooner had he cast off his political coat and donned his municipal robe, than he addressed himself to the stock subject of drainage. His point was, to initiate underground as against surface drainage, and not only did he work up the subject thoroughly, but he collected a mass of information about it, and came down armed with a formidable quire of foolscap closely written and filled with arguments, facts, and quotations. All this, too, at a time of life when most men love to take their ease. The old stock is not to be beaten; we shall sever produce the some type of old man and old woman in these Colonies that abound at Home. The wife of the excellent house-steward at the Timarn Hospital has collected not less than .£B3 towards the fund for purchasing a quantity of special " invalid’s furniture” from England. Only £IOO is wanted, and it ought to come in speedily, considering the excellence of the object sought. The "Unemployed" Commission have arrived at the conclusion that there is no real destitution in the place, and I daresay that is fairly true just now in regard to day labourers. Many of them ore hard up, heaven knows •, but the worst cases among them ate not so deplorable as that of the “ thirty-shilling swell,” who must dress decently, keep up an appearance, and wander all over the place in hopes of a billet; poor artisans and clerks, with nothing to Ml back upon except, mayhap, a half-starved family. Very few people ever consider tho miseries of persons other than the “ ’omy-handed.” Yet the sorrow and starvation of these out-of-collar-clerks are terrible. And not the most paternal Government can relieve them.

I am anxiously awaiting the inevitable hour when a bucket-dredge shall become a sine qw l non in our harbour-making apparatus. With tho example of the Dunedin Board’s unlucky venture before us, I tremble with apprehension. Tho new Inspector of Schools is a vigorous official. He has been industriously testing the progress of the scholars in this district, and hos thrown daylight on dark corners. His report on the Borough Main School is very discouraging, but it is calculated, if properly acted upon, to do incalculable good. Those who are acquainted with the institution experience no surprise at the results of tho lost examination. But, unfortunately, nobody seems to have tho courage to tackle the difficulty. There is a curious indisposition to disturb matters and to sheet homo the blame to the right quarters. Two leading defects in the school have been unveiled—it is undisciplined, and tlie progress of tho various classes is very uneven. Certain teachers score well, by their simple individual force, and in spite of the prevailing disorganisation. The Committee have declined to act upon the report, and have handed over tho dirty work to the Board. Such a shirking ol duty seems to me to furnish an irresistible argument in favour of tho abolition of one or other governing body. I very much fear tho nett result will bo that some understrapper will bo sacrificed to propitiate the offended gods, and thing resume their old jog-trot of inefficiency. The Naval Brigade have elected their captain and " first luff ” in the persons of Mr 0. L, Moaaon (an ex-naval man) and Captain Webster, the Harbour Master. Success to the Brigade! The piano ease has entered upon a new scene. A sold a piano months (nay, years) ago to B, B falling into arrears with ids periodical payments, sold it to C. A sued j{ for the recovery of the piano or of the balance of tho purchase moaev, and got judgment. But, in the meantime, V also failed to pay B. and was thereupon sued; receiving, at the same time, notice from A that the piano was his, and that B had no right to sell it. B got judgment against C, and subsequently execution. The end of 0 then is decidedly unfortunate, for. not only has a distress warrant been taken out against him by the piratical vendor B, but A also claims the instrument. It is possible to pay too dear for a piano, it seems, as welt as for a whistle.

After a Lon ton fast wo tiro to have an ouem carnival. The “Lilliputian*" of Moaara Pollard an* to give us wis nights* amusement, and I have no doubt they will receive hearty support. Tito popularity of opera bouffeii uawmWung, and shows that two wuaic of the day in rapidly changing. Tin? matchless beauty of tho old opera now lion unnoticed, like faded finery, and tho flimsy woh of oomle opera, and it» sparkling tinsel, are all tho rage. Ttmpon t mutant nr. Mrs llmujwen made a good many convert* here, and of course they are all interested in learning of tho lady's matrimonial intentions. The marriage of an Evangelist with a dimrcJ is, besides, rather a striking oirciunatanco. Ilowever, long life and happiness to this clever Oospeller. She deamea a apell of guiet

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