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A NIGHT OUT, Issue 15660, 26 November 1914
A NIGHT OUT
LIVELY POLITICAL MEETINGS. WELLINGTON ELECTORS HAVE THEIR JOKE. [Special to the Stau.i WELLINGTON, November 25. Mr J. I*. Luke, Reform candidate for Wellington South, had a bad lime at Berhampors last night. For some timo tho meeting was fairly quiet, but after one of tho speaker’s statements an elector set tho people laughing by calling out; ‘‘MrLuke, you’re a groat big joke.” From then onwards interruptions were - frequent, but the meeting was good-humored, and the audience appeared to thoroughly enjoy themselves. At the closo a motion of thanks and confidence was greeted with derisive cries, but the chairman declared it carried in tho midst of considerable opposition. PARALYSED WITH STAGE FRIGHT. A CANDIDATE’S SORRY PLIGHT. The funniest meeting since tho campaign started eventuated at Sydney Street Schoolroom last evening, when Mr R. V. Fullbfook essayed tho task of addressing tho Wellington North electors as an Independent Laborite. The candidate was paralysed with stage fright, and if ho had any ieleas on politics he was unablo to give expression to them. He was simply unablo to speak. The audience, who filled the building, wore indulgent. They gave him many minutes to ponder over his large sheaf of notes without interrupting him, but he was unable to use them. Tinie after time he was given an opportunity to collect his thoughts, but they would not come, except to n request to stay in, and when he was lucid enough he presented a psychological problem which the meeting rather sympathetically wondered at. If the candidate could have only got a start on the address which he meditated he would probably have been all right, but he never got a start. He seemed bewildered, and after half an hour frankly confessed that he was unequal to tho task he had sot himself, and ho would have to leave it to a future occasion to carry it out. AMr Agnew was voted to the chair, but after the candidate had been heckled for a few minutes ho said : “ I took the chair thinking the candidate was going to speak, but apparently ho has nothing to say, and I must decline to occupy the chair any longer.” ’ Mr Agnew then left tho platform. Hero aro a few of the incidents that happened after another chairman had been put in charge, which will indicate the character of the meeting: Mr Fullbrook: I stated that I was contesting the seat as an Independent ‘ Labor candidate. A Voice : In favor of the dock. Mr Fullbrook: I don’t want anyone to think that I am out for the purpose of splitting up votes. It would bn a great depth for me to descend to if 1 were to become a tool iu tho hands of the Massey party. Everyone has a perfect right to come out against them. (The candidate interrupted his flow of thought to scratch his leg.) A voice; Have you‘got him? (Great laughter.) Mr Fullbrook later said: I am going to give you now what an unfortunate chap in the mental hospital has sent me. He thinks h© is Samson, and this is tho implement ho uses. (A beef bone is produced amid much merriment.) Accompanying the implement is this message: “ I hear you are about to fight a terrible evil that has used, up all poor little people. I am therefore sending you an implement with which I smote the Philistines.” A Voice: Count him out, Mr Fullbrook: Ladies and gentlemen, if vou are not going to give me a chance there is no use my trying to go on. but really this is my first appearance on the platform. The Voire: I hope it will he tho last. (Laughter.) An elector asked if the candidate was in favor of smoking whitebait. (Laughter.) The Chairman begged that silly questions should not be asked. .The Elector; I have asked the question, and lam waiting for an answer. (Laughter.) Mr Fnlbrook: But it was a very silly question, wasn’t it? (Renewed laughter.) Tile Chairman: The candidate is not Piofessor Prince. (More laughter.) Mr Fulbvock: I am prepared to answer questions. An Elector: Is it true that the Hon. Mr Herdman offered the candidate his Christmas dinner to split votes? _ (Laughter.) Mr Fullbrook: No, it is not correct. (Loud laughter.) Tho Elector: Is the candidate in favor of constructing a canal from Island Bay through Wellington to Lambton Quay for the purpose of providing fish? (Laughter.) The Chairman: I am waiting to hear that question again, please. (Applause.) Any more fishing questions? Another Elector: Has the candidate finished his speech? Mr Fullbrook; Well, if you aro not going to hear me The Elector: Is the candidate in favor of a floating dock in the Magistrate's Court for inebriates? (Great laughter.) Th© Chairman: Are there any further sensible questions? A Voice: Wo want him to make up his mind. Mr Fullbrooke: It is not tho question, it is your head that is at fault. Th© elector expressed the view that .Mr Fullbrook should withdraw in favor of .Mr Holland. Mr Fullbrook expressed Kis willingness to retire if it was the desire of the meeting. and on a vole being taken it was declared by the chairman in favor of Mr Fullbrook continuing to stand.
A NIGHT OUT, Issue 15660, 26 November 1914
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