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Marry a Scotch Girl.

I knew a young fellow who was very sweet on a Scotch spinster. She was a wealthy Scotch spinster, but if there is a kind of woman who must be loved economically and for herself alone it is a Scotch spinster. Scotch spinsters are warranted to make good wives all the time. It is awfnlly hard to be untrue to a Scotchwoman. She makes you so very comfortable, and holds you to her not so much by her heart as by your bank account. She doesn’t always want new bonnets; she is rather liable to object even to your having a new hat until the old one is quite worn out. A Scotch wife can keep her husband neat and trim, and herself and her children as well, at a smaller expense than others. She doesn’t want diamond earrings for her birthday. All you have to do is to show her your bankbook ond kiss her and tell her you owe the big balance to her, and she is quite satisfied. This young fellow did not understand the Scotch spinster, and when he thought to please her, he sent her a lovely and expensive basket of flowers. He went up to receive her thanks and smiles, and he was quite knocked over when she told him he hadn’t a big enough salary to waste it buying flowers for her or anybody else, and she was sorry to see he was so extravagant, because otherwise he was “a very pleasing young man,” He lied himself back into her good graces by saying he had got the flowers for nothing, and he thought he could not make better use of them. She smiled graciously and said: “Seein’ they didna cost you anything, it’s a great compliment.” She was a woman after all,— ‘ San Francisco Chronicle.’

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Bibliographic details

Marry a Scotch Girl., Evening Star, Issue 7976, 3 August 1889, Supplement

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Marry a Scotch Girl. Evening Star, Issue 7976, 3 August 1889, Supplement