POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXXIX, Issue 113, 14 May 1940, Page 6

POSTSCRIPTS

BY PERCY FLAGE

Chronicle and Comment

Fred: Roll up that Old School Tieit won't be needed these 20 years. * * • Fun in the news ("New York Times")'. "Miss Gordon was arrested once for immortality." * * * News article title: How Will Hitter Go? At the moment he's going like | . . * * * It certainly improved the Allies' chances when Adolf took charge of the Nazi forces on the Western Front. * * ♦ Do not blame the stupid general-too much, comments Sir/Edmund Ironside. Remember that soldiers cannot learn their trade in peacetime. * * * BOASTING. We hear a great deal of boasting as to "New Zealand leading the world." Well, she leads the world in two things, but in neither is there any cause for pride. New Zealand is the only country in the whole world where its Parliament is not sitting, and the only country in the whole world, other than U.S.A.* which refuses to have conscription. WHOOZIT. * * * , THE NAZIS SAY Race—race purity—is the slogan of the League for the Breeding and Protection of Cats. The cat grandmother of the long-haired cats must be a Per* sian or German long-haired cat. The long-haired cat is of German origin. The German cat grandmother is always the ideal. The German standard for the judging of cats, as drawn up by, the league, is recognised in the whole of Central Europe. The motto of tha league is: "Through selective breeding to the Defence of the Cat." This Aryan biological profundity appeared in the "Deutsche Allgemeinf Zeitung!" : • ♦ • WATER v. BEER. (Reprinted from the , "N.Z..E.* Chronicles," edited by Clutha Mackenzie.) I suppose we're a lot of heathens, Don't live on the angel plan; But we're sticking it in the trenches, And doing the best we can; While preachers 'way Down Under Who rave on Kingdom Come, Ain't pleased with our ability, And wants to stop our .rum.. Water, they say, would be better; Water! Great Scott! 'Out here We're up to our knees in water; Do they thin' we're standing. in : beer? Oh, it sounds all right in the pulpit, When you sit in a cushioned pew? But try fdur days in the trenches, And see what water will do. ■ ■' ANZAC JIM. * * ♦ INTIMATION. "Nyne."—Not quite suited to this feature. Thanks all the same. Cobar.—So far we have not been invited to join the Democratic Labour Party. Anyway, after paying our income- tax our purse is as light? as an obese white butterfly 1 '. ' D.R.M.C.—Nice imagination, but publication might easily find us dodging brickbats. J.G. ("Mother's Day").—Well, here's the last.verse, in all its lyrical splendour— '..... Mum's entitled to her day, She's worked hard for ii\ anyway; And all her grandchildren will say, She has earned her "Mother's Day." O. Kay.—K.O.'d. - Miramar.—Look back about a month ago and you will find in Col. 8 what you are seeking. Jabez (Paraparauiriu).—Mae West quip not in our line. Anyway, it's as ancient as elastic-sided boots. Frank D—So you challenge us to write a "serious jingle" about a slice of bread and dripping or a broken beer bottle? That's a wager. No Name: You say, "Please insert' this in your column." Sorry, but it doesn't deserve it. Drum: Not quite up to your best. G.R.H. ("From the Home Front"); Not any use to us since it has appeared elsewhere. W.P.K.: You must have some regard for the powers that be, brother. Publication would land us in a spot of trouble. * * * ■ TO WINSTON CHURCHILL. Here's tq Churchill whom we know Just the one to make things go— With his brains he'll deal each blow For the Motherland; He's the one t the Germans hateSoon they'll know their hopeless fate-He-who made the Navy great Loathes ;the Fatherland. Hitler now has turned the keyHolland, Belgium now are free From the Nazi tyrannyChurchill is their friend; He will save these little landsWrench them from the Nazi handsBind'in well-clenched iron bands Hitler's Germany! Europe soon will sing his praiseHe the trail of peace will blazeHe the Germans will amaze By his derring-doe; Goering, Hitler, Ribbentrop, Soon will want the war to stopWant to close their butcher's shopHasty actions rue. Not till Winston's smashed them well. Sent them packing off to H Where their kind for ever dwell— Will his'hand be stayed; We are with him, one and- all— Rich and poor, the old, the small-* Germany shall fall—fall—fallBaffled—rent— dismayed. RIORDAN HASTINGS * * « IMMORTAL ERRORS. "John o' Groats" sent us a list of Biblical and other errors, from which we have taken the following examples:— In 1549 there appeared a Bible with an interesting variation on Psalm 91. As printed, verse 5 read: "Thou shalt not be afraid for the bugges by night." Clearly this was the worst form of "terror by night" which. the translator could imagine! Cloverdale's 1535 Bible gave the same rendering. The Bibls of 1653 contained the interesting passage in the First Book of Corinthians, Chapter 6, verse 9: "Know ye not that the unrighteous shall inherit the Kingdom of God." Biblical errors sometimes had very costly results. A single misplaced letter in the Cambridge Bible of 1638 is believed to have cost Oliver Cromwell a bribe of £1000. In this edition Acts 6, verse 3 reads: "Whom ye may appoint," instead of "we." The "Wicked Bible" of 1631 caused a fine of £300 to be imposed on the printer, Robert Barker, and all the | available copies were called in an£ burned. As a consequence, the few copies which survived are very valu» able. Archbishop Laud is said •to have spent the proceeds of the fina on a fount of Greek type for present i tation to Oxford.