POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXXV, Issue 109, 11 May 1938, Page 10

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

BY PERCY FLAGS

Predilection Day. • • * "Platonist."—Learning may be imposed from without, but education must come from within. « * '» Add aphorisms: Etiquette is the artificial substitute for tact and good breeding. * * » Polling Day pews flash.—Some candidates admit that they are full of a quiet lack of confidence. KEN. * # » Probably Mr. Nash has been deputed to answer the Opposition Leader because he is less likely to kick over the traces than somebody we wot of. • ♦ » An English commentator says that; in spite of their performances to date, he does not unduly fear the Australians. But then he hasn't to, play •against them. •/ • » RETORT COURTEOUS. It tsed to be the custom, in India to end the official letters: "I have the honour to be, Sir, your taost obedient servant," A young civilian wrote to object to signing himself in that way: ho- said that he was not - anyone's obedient servant, and that if he were he would not consider it an honour. The then Chief Secretary to the Gov. ernment, replying to the .objection, be« gan his letter thus: ' "Jones (this was not his name), 1 do not write 'My Dear Jones' for yoti are not dear to me, and, thank God, you are not mine." - ♦ # • BRAIN TEASER. That Costs-Pence "doublet" seems to have tied up a number of our re* gulars. So far only half a dozen bi them have clued out the puzzle; J.G.F. and Zarda (each in nine moves), and Diana C. (thanks for that teaser). Rich, T.M.L., and Peter (each in tea moves). "John Doe" writes plaintively} "Already I have spent several hours on turning Costs into Pence, and the best I can do is to ladder' it in thirteen moves. The wife's no help t« me: you see, she's only a B.A. (Victoria College), and naturally is not up in such things. Isn't it disillusioning?" (It most certainly is.—P.F.); B.P. sends, us one of his very ownj we may use it one of these days. ■ ». * • PEARLY GATES. When i the politician arrived at thfll Pearly Gates he was challenged by St. Peter, as a politician would have to iriake out a pretty good case before they would let him in. "Was he generous?" "Yes," said the politician. "Whyt we voted Eighteen Millions for Th« Poor." "But," said St. Peter, ."thafs no| generous; that's other people')! monen Could you not give instances o£ pew sonal generosity?" . "Well," said the politician aftef some hesitation, "I remember once giving a man a shilling up in Cuba Street." "Well," said St. Peter ,to the "if that's the best he can do, then give him back his shilling, and tell hixq to go to H !" BILLY GOAT. I - "■ # ■■■ ' CORRECTION No. X Dear Flage,—Your publication of lUs* Slade-Jones's letter regarding motor* cycle records suggests that it is just possible that no one has yet pointed out the slip you made in "No. 8" the same night. According to the formula for a falling body (that sent was not setable.—P.F.), in lsec body falls 16fi in 2sec body falls 64ft, in secona second body falls 48ft, etc. ' Your figures give the velocity at the end of each second. If my memory serves me right, an Italian named, ] think, Lenni, recently attained approxin mately 180 m.p.h. on a Possibly, however, this was a speed only. The machine was a super* charged four-cylinder of SOOcc.—the same size as a normal 3 J h.p. single. 1$ was fully streamlined, , AERODROME, i *• . * * f NO FLOWERS: ' "Sagittarius," of the "New States* man and Nation," discusses the League of Nations in this cynical vein. "Say not the struggle naught availeth!" We will discuss the status quo. Geneva's radiant sunrise paleth, There lingers yet the afterglow. And none the less the world advances Piecemeal towards our peaceful goal Though we perceive when circuit* stances Have passed beyond the League'! control. . Though there be reason for dejection In Abyssinia, China, Spain, Such instances of imperfection ; ; Are lessons never learned in vain, i Freed from the idealist's confusion We hold the,realistic view, And banning sanctions and A broader covenant renew, No more impatient pf fruition, Each painful setback we survive, More constant in decomposition Than when we thought we were aliv& # * -# ■ ' WITH—bR WITHOUT—WATER? Deaf Flage,—lt is stated, that four* fifths of the earth's surface is Water; Also that for the daily nourishment of the human body 510 grammes of solids ifi the way of proteins, starches, fats; and minerals are required—plus 2340 grammes bf water. Man is born .with an inveterate thirst. His infant cry is hushed with a drink, and the "fountain of life" is visited again and again, from the day-old "chick" stage to the inevitable death-bed. Kindly Nature has decreed that/ the bulk of hiit nourishment shall lie in pleasant wayi —and "containers" 'only 1 requiring "filling up again" with the particular liquid that "tickles" his palate most. This wise provision obviates a succession of courses—many of which indigestion bans. The poet who wrote; "Drink to me only with thine eyes; And I will pledge with mine," did not eternally forswear the pleasing containers requiring filling up again. From .prehistoric times'-to the era of home-brew, man has persistently tinkered with water in its natural state. Said to be an excellent medium for putting "out" fire—his main endeavour has been exerted to introduce "fire," and colour, into the water. Many, and varied, are its devotees, and further experimental efforts, and samplings, bid fair to persist until the crack of doom. Scientists who claim that the human body is largely composed of water may have based their conclusions upon the first 'year of infant life. Many adults have been known to boast that pure, unadulterated water has not "crossed" their lips in years. They, claim it "rusts one's innards." Jovial Falstaff had strong vfcws along those lines, too, despite his partiality for cakes. Their slogan, with apologies to The Ancient Mariner, runs:— "Water, water, every where — bU| 'little' fit to drink." GJfc'j-