"OH, CHRISTMAS!"

Evening Post, Volume CXII, Issue 150, 22 December 1931, Page 24

"OH, CHRISTMAS!"

(Original.) / / W WOJTOBR what exactly to tho time of the yea**" inquired Pat %• ■ M'Hardy, as he laziiy stretched himself in the warm sunlight. ' I "Well, I don't know exactly," replied his friend, Paddy Adair. I "But surely this year isn't ne*t year," * "You sure are talking crooked," .said his mate cynically. "It's time you showed your whiskers at some civilised place wheie your •UKoundings might return some of your polished manners." t ' "Gosh, you are always trying .to get the rope over my, head luifl a Iftiiner fewoing a bull," answered Paddy, in hurt tones. "I've never done such a thing to you yet/ xoai-ed Pat, ana vainly triad to look angry and ill-used,' '", ' ' ' Paddy Adair and Pat M'Hardy were cobber*. Being hard up for cash and craving a holiday, they retired to the back of beyond—gold digging. Being so far away from the haunts of men had made them Jose all idea of time. Having done extraordinarily well at; their claim, they ▼owed to celebrate on Christmas Day; but now they realised that'the timo had fled and that' at least it was November. "Gosh," ejaculated Paddy, with strong stress upon that particular piece of slang. "What if it is too late to sell the gold for a regular Christmas tiiek-iut" ' " '' - •--■■■ ''"Well, then, W«»ll.:have an after-Chrisfcrnai"feed,":«*td_Pat calmly; /'when •raryone else is lounging about and wishing Christmas dinners had never bMB invented!" , "This way or that," reasoned Paddy,' "something must be. done to get MW3 of certain things," or we'll be "thinking 1932 is 1931 before it is time." ' "I propose that you go down to the town and mix with-all the gostnpf and fossick out news," said Pat. "Sure,. I'm game," concluded Paddy, , "You always are," answered Pat, without envy. Aa Paddy had a long and tedious -trip, both mates arose with the sun, It generally took over fifteen hours to "reach the town, but wltfi his horse ♦'Molly" he hoped to arrive in fourteen, as she was in good condition, and had been worked very littlq for some time. After Paddy had disappeared from view, Pat felt very lonely; but, liovrerer, on the third day of his pard's absence he spring-cleaned their shack and made it look bright and cheerful. - At last came tho longed-for sounds' of horse's hoof-beats echoing far down in the thicket. At this"," Pat 'grintacd to himself, placed the bacon and potatoes in tho pan, and sprang up and away to meet his worthy friend. Paddy did not wear his usual smilo as he dismounted from his panting steed. In fact, he looked rather worried, "What's the matter?" inquired Pat, with consternation, "It's Christmas Day to-morrow!" "Oh, Chrislmas?" murmured Pat, blankly., "It will be an after-Christmas tnck-in for us, all right." Paddy suddenly smiled... '.'l've a gigantic brain-wave," he declared. "What is it?" asked Pat, .with, interest, "Don't let it hurt you." "Let's make a Christmas, pudding]'.' was the .startling rejoinder. "Capital idea!" exclaimed his friend. "But what about the ingredients?" "I know just how it goes," answered Paddy, rolling up his somewhat grimy sleeves and grasping a mixing bowl at the same time. The pudding, tied sectrrely •in• a- 'cloth,1 -simmered gently on the fire an a huge iron pot. The attitude -of- the1 two1 pards could have been accurately described as paternal as they watched that delicious morsel slowly cooked before their eyes. At length Paddy voted the pudding cooked, and Pat hung it out on their crazy clothesline to dry. While they were idling, an idea struck Paddy. "You are always getting good ideas," said Pat, when Paddy told him of it. "What is it?" "Let's go and shoot somo birds for our Christmas dinner!" "Sure," said Pat. "We must have something out of the ordinary Lo precede the pudding." As they disappeared among the trees, a shabby figure rose cautiously from behind dome bushes, and crept towards the clothesline—in its hand gleamed a knife. Pat and Paddy returned with a string of game, fat birds nf; that. As they neared their dwelling, Pat teased Paddy about being a fat cook •who poisoned all the food, and on tho wholo they could hot help feeling merry as wo all do at Christmas. f However, with birds slung over their (Shoulders and* hands thrust in pockets, they came in full view of tho clothesline. They came to a brief halt, and stared open-eyed at the pudding that wasn't there! "Seems like as if the what's-its-naome was too good to be solid, so it melted," said Pat anxiously. ' Finally they concluded that it must have been stolen, but whether by man or animal they could not tell. At last they decided it was stolen by •ome two-logged beast with arms and an empty stomachl There was only one thing to be done, and Paddy grasped his gun and ■tolled out, followed by his scowling mate. Two hours later, they .returned without a trace of the elusive thief §■<! pudding. "So you can't bo too far away from mankind," gasped Pat, as he sank M to a bunk. "Oh, Christmas!" And Paddy felt the tame. "KONINI" (16). CttUingww*. i