"SPIT AND POLISH"

Evening Post, Volume CXIII, Issue 100, 30 April 1927, Page 20

"SPIT AND POLISH"

ADMIRALTY'S CONFLICTING

ORDERS.

The Groat War may have boon the undoing of many things,' but the Spit and Polish Tradition was not ono of thorn. The Admiralty is evidontly in the throos of ra, thoroughly bad attack of it, for a Fleet Ordor has just been issued declaring that oyory bit of metal about flic sword bayoheta carried by' tho Boyal Marinos is now to be kept polished. "This work will be carried out by the non-commissioned officers and men concerned," the order explains thoughtfully— so that it will bo no use sitting down and waiting for an admiral or- the First Sea Lord to come along and lend a hand with tho polishing process (says a correspondent of the "Manchester Guardian"). Also "the grips, nuts, and screws aro not to be removed for this purpose, and care is to bo taken to avoid injuring these components'.'—in other words, a quite useloss .piece of,work is to-bo made just as difficult and laborious as possible. If the Royal Marines carry (as they presumably do) the sword bayonet with which the ordinary member of tho P. 8.1 was equipped during the war the task will bo one needing an heroic amount of elbow-grease, for the metal on tho scabbard of that weapon was deliberately dulled and tho blado itself had apparently been finished with a sandblast, so that it had tho appearance of frosted glass. Still, if His Majesty's Jollies ,could .manage to keep out of any more wars, say, for ten years; and to spend most of that time in caressing, their bayonets with "pinky" or "Soldier's Friend, "they would doubtless bo ablo to go into action in the hour of England's need with as bright a,set of stainless cutlery as over graced a luncheon-table. ■'.- *

And that; mark yoii; is where the real joke of .this' new order comes in. Brilliant bayonets and.bayonet fittings are : too noticeable for active service; that is why the duller weapons were used in France.: So the Admiralty Fleet^ Order just issued ends on the warning note:— "Arrangements are: to be made for the polished bayonets and scabbards to be rusted or otherwise 'dulled' in- H.M. ships as far as practicable 1 in the event, of the R.M. detachment being required to land for service.". So that, the industrious Jolly must, first .toil to put a high polish on something that was. never constructed for th^t treatment j and then, if there is ever afcy likelihood of his having to use'th* result, he must toil to take all the polish off again. One can only hope that this order has been transmitted to China. It clearly shows that the British Navy is iii no mood for trifling and ought to strike the most awful terror into the keaTtg of any iUdii^pse^ .Cantoncca. , _^ •■- -—^-_1_"