To Rejoin the Colours. A TRUE STORY OF THE ARMY RESERVE.

Evening Post, Volume LX, Issue 102, 27 October 1900, Page 1 (Supplement)

To Rejoin the Colours. A TRUE STORY OF THE ARMY RESERVE.

Thomas Atkins Shrapnel was a Reserve man of the Blunkshiro Regiment. Vviien he left the coloux-3 and wenb into the Reserve he found employment for the exercise of his talent by helping to "stoke" the furnaces of various steamships, on which he shipped as fireman. By the avmy regulations ho was not supposed to leave the United Kingdoan during his term of service in the Reserve, but like every other Reserve man he would have scoffed had you told him his Queen and country would be in such dire need of his services that he would be called back to the colours during his term. So it was with an easy conscience that he regularly went over the sea in the stoke-holes of various steamers. When the present war was looming big on the political horizon Thomas' i&kins Shrapnel read the papers like every one else, but also like every one else he took the matter lightly. "Ole Kruger won't fight. Not 'c. 'E's too cute. All 'c 4 wants is to try an.' bluff like 'c did in 1881. But there's a Tory, .Government in nowj an' 'c knows It, so 'ell climb down 'isself this time. Chance of the Reserves bein' called up? Nah l No such bloomin' luck!" So off he went to sea. But during his return voyage Kruger decided to fight, and the Reserves were called up. Thomas Atkins Shrapnel was ignorant of this. His boat came «V at 2 o'clock this morning from America, and he went and climbed into his parents' house through the back kitchen window, and, without jttmsing any one, he took off his cap, coat, and vest, arid went to sleep on the sofa in the front room. * He was awakened by the clatter of his parents and bfothers and sisters at breakfast next morning, and rising from the sofa, he went into the kitchen. The family would not have been very much surprised to see him at another time, for he had frequently made his appearance on a return from a voyage in this off-hand manner before, but now they had news — great news ! "Thomas Atkins!" shrieked his mother. "Your call came ten. days ago, Tom!" bellowed his brothers. "'Urrah! an' now you'll be too late, 'cos the regiment sails to-night, an' you won't be shot at all!" screamed his sisters. roared Thomas Atkins Shrapnel, banging hi 3 fist on the table till the crockery danced again. "Wot dyer mean by calls, an' regiments sailin', an' too lates, an' jiot at alls?" "Why, don't you know?" gasped his father. • "Know what?" demanded Thomas Atkins. ; "Why, tho Reservists have been called upl" burst out his father. "Wot!" shrieked Thomas Atkins; and he fell into a chair in sheer astonishment. "The Reserves 'aye been called up," repeated his father; "you've been called up. Your call came ton days ago. The — " "Where is it? Show itl Hand it over I Sharp !" thundered . Thomas Atkins, springing to life and activity. He snatched tho official notice from his mother, glanced at it, and yelled : "I ort to 'aye joined three days ago at latest ! Oh, my Gawd !" Then he demanded wildly: "When d'ye say the regiment sails?" "To-nighjt, at 8 o'c)ock,". chorussed vis parents and sisters and brothers. '"Ell!" yelled Thomas Atkins, franti-, cally; "where's the time-table? Find it quick, before I pull the blocmin' 'ouse down." Tearing it from his brother he hastily glanced at tho trains and saw that — c only one that would enable him to catch tho troopship at Southampton left the local station in five minutes. He was clad only in shirt,^trousers, and boots — just as he had thrown himself ddwn to sleep the previous night, but as he was he turned and dashed to the door. "Where are you going?" shrieked his mother. "Goo- bye all!" yelled Thomas Atkins in reply, as he flung open the door and dashod into the street, down which he tore at top speed. "What's up," cried a' policeman, but Thomas Atkrns Shrapnel had no time or breath to waste in replying. "Somebody 'urted ! Man going for doctor!" cried the passers-by. .Thomas Atkins Shrapnel had nearly a anile to cover in that five minutes, but he dashed into the station as the train was moving out. "Stand back!" shouted the officials. "Go to 'ell !" roared Thomas Atkins Shrapnel, as he dived head foremost into the open .window of a compartment. A second later he thrust his head out of the window with a triumphant gasp of : "'Urrah! God Save the Queen!" In his "undress" he travelled an eight hours' journey to Southampton, reached his regiment, explained his answering the call in such an unusual manner, was medically examined, passed, and allowed to sail with his corps, to his boisterous delight.