Reporter’s diary

Press, 6 October 1987, Page 2

Reporter’s diary

Sound of cash-registers FANS of Mozart operas might be aggrieved to hear that, going by Mercury Theatre evaluations, 13 weeks of “The Sound of Music” is the equivalent of a season of Mozart’s “Don Giovanni.” The Rodgers and Kammerstein musical, which has only just finished after a recordbreaking extended season, has compensated for the loss of “Don Giovanni,” which was cancelled when the theatre lost a Government grant, the Mercury Theatre general manager, Mr Joe Desmond, said. The 77 performances were seen by 38,000 people and the 13week run was the longest season for a professional production in New Zealand.

Reptile restraint CAR seat belts usually help protect the wearer from harm in an accident, but one belt designed for an alligator has more the safely of other people in mind. Captain Edwards, of Surbiton, Britain, is an authority on reptiles and he takes his pet alligator with him as exhibit “A” when lecturing. Captain Edwards says the belt would protect people from the ’gator were it to escape. In the event of a car accident, the alligator could be useful as extra “jaws of life” equipment Melon-folly OF all the claims to fame open to a thriving metropolis such as Shanghai, this must surely be the oddest melon-rind acci-

dents. Like the bananaskin somersaults of comicbooks, more than 1000 people in one month broke bones by slipping on melon rinds, mostly tossed aside by young lovers.

Racked with pain?

ANOTHER delight to titillate the furies of people who object to words such as host hospital, and even funeral, being used as verbs: stretcher. It was

heard during Sunday's screening of the motor racing on television, when some unfortunate driver was “' retchered” from the raceway. The treatment sounds worse than the injury.

Frying officer

TALES of drunk and hooligan passengers aboard aircraft have produced many stories of stoic efforts by flight crew to preserve calm. Few, how-

ever, match the panache with which a pilot of one airline dealt with a particularly obnoxious sot. A stewardess complained about the man, who was definitely the worse for wear. The pilot, a large fellow, grabbed a fire axe and marched down the aircraft. He inserted the blunt side of the axe under tbe man’s chin, lifted him out of his seat and growled: “If I have any more trouble with you, Hl eat you.” The rest

of the flight passed without incident Ultra-defensive driving SEEN trundling round j Christchurch was a glis- , tening late-model four-, wheel-drive vehicle. Pro-1 t fessionally signwritten on ' the back was the enigmatic message: “The cu- > rate’s mother-in-law’s \ Suzuki.” Some curate. Some mother-in-law. —Jenny Feltham \