HAVE A LAUGH

Bay of Plenty Times, Volume LX, Issue 11153, 30 June 1933, Page 3

HAVE A LAUGH

THE LATEST IN “HOWLERS.” The following collection of "howlers” are the latest efforts of some Wellington scholars. They are genuine, and certainly rank among the best we have read: Correct the following sentence: “Having eaten her dinner the next thing was to catch a train.” Answer —Having eaten her dinner the next thing was to wash up. (On a desert Island). —The gay colour caught the native’s eye, and she rushed to the shore, thrilled to the boots. It sent a miriad reverberations through the ship. The ship had struck a dialect, and the water tight valves had failed. Captain Cook was sent out to New Zealand to see Venus; when he turned round he saw New Zealand, so he discovered it. The duties of City Councillors are to grope together and argue. Lord Shaftesbury succeeded in pasting three bills and when he died he had a hundred children to see him berried. On the journey the man sent all liis vitals by rail. White Island exports sardines. The Waikato River flew into the Hauraki Gulf. They walked over the glacier carrying their goods and horses. The people in Jamaica 'had bananas to fall back on. Magellan navigated the Strait and sailed into the teeth of the Roaring Nineties. From White Island we get Solfa. In Shakespeare’s day the actors did not have costumes but merely placards pinned on them telling the audience what they repreesnted.