The Editor suggests

Auckland Star, Volume LXVI, Issue 70, 23 March 1935, Page 2 (Supplement)

The Editor suggests

CRITIQUE

The following- people have written "C" grade stories, which need definite Improvement before they lind a mark: —Marie Pasalich, Betty Wlnlcelraann, Audrey iioccjuard and Fay Junes. Phyllis Beck—l'm sure ":!0:!5 A.D." will not he at all as you picture it. Phyllis. It was carefully written, and almost "B" grade. Try something loss fantastic. Jean Smart—Your story. "Piun and Hilly," would have heen greatly improved hud you used corrncl punctuation marks. Jean. lie more careful next time. Ivy Lcos—"A Thlnjj Of Uoauty" was a good e.-siy, ivy, spoiled by tho use or 100 many ad.ieciives. Try some subject simpler ihan u sunset, and make your sontenres less rambling. Froda Harper—School stories life rarely succe-sspil, Fl'PCla, "All. Advenlui'e" was onl'.- "C" ffrede. MaICQ your sentences sliortrr. Rita Siigir— A dnlnly little I lirv laic. Kila, and unrcl'ull,v wrllten. I his' storj , was vory nearly up to publication standard.

Monica Matheson—"Threepence ,, i= an "A" grade story, Monica, ir is well told, well deserving tlic book prize awarded it. Pay mpre attention to .your curl in?-. You Know their importance cannot be overestimated, and this one is just ;i little weak. Amy Ray—Always choose a title tliat fits the story, and write on one side of I lie paper only. Amy. Florence Smart—There was not enough plot in- "Judith's Garden." Florence, it was a cposs betwe'en a fairy tale air.l ;i garden story. Keep tlic two types distinct. Keith Walker—"Music" ami "Old Jimmy's score" are both "C" grneie tales. Kcitli. Tiic main rnnll wltb your work seems to bo tliat although you rlioose a ijuitu original rllmax, you cannot work up .mi interesting , introduction to it. See if you can improve this. Elizabeth Armstrong—lt was rather i pity Unit you cJiosh such an ordinary plot ror "A .Night Adventure," Klizjbetli. Tor otherwise the story would have been "B" grade, Gsorgc Wctt—\ good llrsl effOM, (Teargo, which is placed in !'B" grade. Do noi Uurry the conclusion or ii tele, however, ami work out your (illmaxci more carefully,