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Police. —There was no business at the Court this morning. The City of Perth.— As far as can be ascertained, the only damage the City of Perth has sustained while aground was the loss of part of her rudder. Football. —A match was played on the Domain ground yesterday between the Borough and High Schools, resulting in a victory for the Borough School. Clark, Wood, and Felton played well for the High School, and McFarlane, Preston, and Henderson for the Borough School. Off to the Exhibition. —An excursion train, consisting of sixteen carriages, left Ashburton this morning with a large number of visitors to the Exhibition. There were very few excursionists from places south of Ashburton, but when the train left the local station every carriage was closely packed, and there could not have been leas than 300 persons from here who took advantage of the praiseworthy enterprise of the Government in issuing cheap fares to visit the “ World’s Show.” The train started from Timaru at seven o’clock this morning, and is due here, on the return journey, at five minutes past eight p.m. Ah Outsider’s Opinion. —The Timaru Herald, of yesterday, in speaking of the late election, says : —The proceedings at the declaration of the poll for Wakanui on Saturday seem to have been very lively. Mr Saunders was literally howled down by Mr Ivess’ supporters, which, considering that Mr Saunders was the defeated candidate, and had fought an uphill fight with great courage and ability, was not very chivalrous on their part. A public man of old standing and of high reputation, after losing two elections, might, we think, fairly have been allowed to relieve his feelings, and say what he had to say without interruption. But the electors at Ashburton evidently think differently, for they crowned their victory over Mr Saunders and the northern end of the district, by giving him about the ugliest quarter of an hour that he ever had in his life. They yelled and groaned and hissed whenever ho attempted to speak, and if the published accounts are to bo relied on, the tumult very nearly ended in a stand up fight between Mr Saunders on one side and any number of Mr Ivess’s supporters on the other. We doubt not Mr Saunders gave his foes plenty of provocation. He is an old man, but an uncommonly tough ono, and he has about the roughest tongue, when he is put to it, that wo ever heard. He calls a spado a spado and no mistake. Still, hard words break no bones, and if the electors had let him have his fling, their triumph would have been only enhanced by their moderation in tho hour of victory. It is not eveiyono who can take a beating well, and unless a candidate has done something to be ashamed of, it is rather too bad first to defeat him, and then to deny him tho melancholy satisfaction of giving his opponents a bit of his mind at the finish. We do not like to see this spirit of savagery imported into popular politics. A contested election is ono of the grandest forms of excitement. But the whole success of the thing depends on the combatants keeping their temper, and never forgetting the golden rule that “ fair play’s a jewel.”

Tendeks.—M ss:b Matson, Cox and Co. Invito tenders for ploughing.

Diffekent Tastes —Mr W. B. Bradlaugh, the brother of the member for Northampton, is at present conducting an evangelistic mission at Jedburgh with marked success. He is aided in religious services by a young lady who sings hymns and solos very prettily.

A Lien on Her. —From Auckland wo learn that in the case "of Captain Anderson, owner of the cutter Severn, against the crew, who held the vessel against all comers, owing to their wages not being paid, Judge McDonald held that the crew had a lien on the vessel till their wages were paid. Portraits. —It is notified elsewhere that the proprietors of the American Gem Photographic Studio have decided to remain in Ashburton till the end of this week. The portraits are a marvel of cheapness, besides being very well executed. While the “ gems” are made a speciality, the proprietors also turn out cartes de visiie and cabinet sizes in the usual way. Good News for “Drunks.” —Mr Carew, R. M., Dunedin, ruled the other day that a person who, when intoxicated, has complete possession of his reasoning faculties, but has lost the use of his means of locomotion, cannot bo deemed drunk. This will be cheering nows to those intelligent individuals who need the assistance of lamp-post, pumps, and other convenient fixtures to assist them on their way home after “ seeing a friend.”

Debating Society. This evening a private entertainment will be held in connection with the above at Saunders’ buildings. The entertainment will take place instead of the ordinary debate. Mr H. M. Jones has kindly consented to lend a piano for the occasion, and a number of members have promised to lend their assistance. We quite expect to chronicle a jolly evening. Each member is privileged to introduce a couple of friends.

Immigration and Emigration. —The following is a return of immigration and emigration for the first five months of the current calendar year, 1882 : —Arrivals from places beyond the colony—Russell, 77; Auckland, 1,404; Gisborne, 12; Wellington, 415; Napier, 60; Nelson, 1; Greymouth, 34; Hokitika, 7; Lyttelton, 225; Timaru, 5; Oamaru, 1; Dunedin, 1,000; Invercargill, 850 ; total, 5,091. Departures from the colony—Russell, 138 ; Auckland, 909; Gisboine, 8; Wellington. 441; Napier, 81; Nelson, 21: Greymouth, 80; Hokitika, 63;Lyttelton, i? 6; Oamaru, 6; Timaru, 12; Dunedin, 542; Invercargill, 782; Wanganui, 1; total, 3,260. Excess of immigration over emigration, 831 —from January Ist to May 31st, 1882.

A Curious Editor. —lt is not often that you hear of an editor with any curiosity. Most of them accept earthquakes, tornadoes, murders, fires, and floods as evory-day occurrences, and even a nitroglycerine explosion next door would not interrupt the routine work of the sanctum very long. But a French editor—the editor of a Lyons paper—had a curiosity to know how a person feels when drowning. He therefore put up a job on himself. Ho arranged to come within a hair’s-broadth of drowning, but was to be pulled up in the nick of time, rolled on a barrel, hauled over the sand, thumped on the stomach, and otherwise resuscitated. All went well daring the first act. He leaped into the water, refused to struggle, and he gradually sank from sight. At the proper moment he was hauled up by a rope, and act second commenced. This was an occasion where an editor was too smart. They rolled him according to programme, and seven or eight men tired themselves out with rubbing him and hanging him up head downwards, but he was'll dead man. Ho may know how it feels to drown, but he’ll never trouble the public with a description of bis feelings. Forty Winks in the Vice-Regal Box. —The following is from the Melbourne Leader of a recent date :— ‘ ‘ A certain distinguished person patronised the play the other night, occupying a conspicuous position in the dress circle, say of the Theatre Royal, which enabled him not only to see, but to be seen. It may have been the claret, or it may have been the company, or perhaps it was the piece that exercised a somniferous influence upon the noble spectator. In any case the coronetted head nodded fitfully for a time, and finally sank upon the vice-regal bo ;om in the enjoyment of a nap, from which none of his suite had the courage to awaken him. The seizure of forty winks upon official occasions is not at all an unfamiliar spectacle to them. But by-and-bye it became buzzed about the stage as well as the theatre that the right honorable visitor was not so closely critical of the performance as was expected. Consternation, not unmixed with disgust, reigned in the bosoms of the actors, and it Was with an ungentle gleam of the eye that the male star said hurriedly under his breath to his associates, ‘ Never mind, I’ll rouse him.’ He was playing the part of a prodigal who had difficulties with his paternal, and presently, hurrying over the first words of a sentence, he delivered its conclusion with a final shriek as if of appeal : ‘ All right, boys, I have fixed the Guv’nor.’ The old gentleman, who had been dreaming of his pigs, started up at once, and half rose from his seat, under the impression that his health had been proposed at an agricultural show dinner. It was a moment or two before ha grasped the situation. But the device succeeded ; he did not sleep again.”

Mount Hu it Road Board. —This Board mot on Thursday last. Present: Messrs Cameron, McMillan, and the chairman, Mr Julian Jackson. The Overseer’s report was read and considered. The Overseer was instructed to write to the Ashburton Forks Railway Company, and request them to put a culvert through the line at Mitcham, as this crossing blocks tho storm-water back, and damages tho road. And also request them to put down a crossing on the road leading through sections 26681 and 28288, so as to enable tho owner of section No. 28775 to got to his land, the railway having taken all the frontage. Mr E. S. Coster applied to tho Board to have the road formed from Blackford to the junction of the West Coast Road. The matter was loft to the Chairman and Overseer to deal with. Messrs Gilchust, Johnston, and Morgan and Hibbs applied to get the side of the road in front of their business premises shingled. It was resolved to have the work done. The County Council wrote enclosing the copy of a letter received by them from the Land Office, Christchurch, re appointment of forest rangers, and suggesting that the surveyors of the different Boards should act as such. Tho Board decided to allow their Surveyor to act as suggested. Tho County Council also wrote requesting the Board to inform them what gravel reserves are avialable for planting purposes, giving preference to those already fenced. The Overseer was instructed to write to the County Council, and inform them that there arc three reserves available and fenced. It was resolved to write to the Mount Somers Road Board, and ask thorn to apply for the corner of section No. 281190, for a shingle reserve. Tho Chairman was appointed on behalf of the Board to attend the County Council meeting re the boundary road. Tenders were opened for the various works advertised, and only one accepted, viz : —For filling in ruts on Broom Park road, at 2s 6d per chain ; crossings, 50s each. All other tenders were considered too high. After passing accounts amounting to LSB 9s sd, the Board adjourned till July 14th, 1882.

High Water. —The Ashburton river is higher at the present time than it has been since 1808. The Hunt Club. — The hounds meet tomorrow at 2 p. in. at Johnston’s corner, Winchmore road. Longbeach Road Board District. — The Longbeach Road Hoard notifies its intention of striking a rate of 6d in the £ at its next ordinary meeting. The Shortest Day. —To-day, the 21st of June, is “the shortest day” in the year, and forms the half-way house, so to speak, on the road tc spring.

The Defaulting Auctioneer. —Bennett, the defaulting Christchurch auctioneer, was brought back yesterday from Auckland. When searched at the Auckland police station, Bennett only had Lsor LG on him.

How to go Home. —The attontionof any of our readers who may be thinking of paying the Old Country a visit, is directed to the announcement elsewhere by Messrs Wilson, Sawtell and Co., notifying the despatch of a number of fine steamships for Home, via San Francisco.

Mesmerising a Goose. —“ John Chinaman ” in Dunedin (says an exchange) has called the science of electro-biology to his aid in the practice of his litde humors In the pilfering line. A progressive Celestial was lately caught—or rather beheld, he was too nimble to he caught holding an open bag before a fine goose in the poultry yard of a settler, and mesmerising it to induce it to enter the bag. The Chinaman was on his knees intently gazing into the eyes of the goose, and evidently had attracted the bird, when he unfortunately “ attracted ” the eye of the guidwife from an upstairs window, and John’s scientific manipulation was shorn of results. Next seance he holds we would recommend him to mesmerise the owners of the coveted poultry in the first place.

How to Scare Burglars. —Murray, the Whitehall burglar, now in Dennemora prison, says the small barking dog is the most formidable object to success that members of his profession have to encounter. While electric alarms, patent fastenings and such devices are thoroughly understood and evaded by burglars, who always make, in the disguise of pedlars, begging tramps, etc., a day examination of the premises to be invaded at night, the little canine that will run under sofas, bureaus, and other furniture, and bark continually, is the one sentinel that never slumbers and cannot bo bribed. He advises every family therefore to keep a small terrier or rat dog, and train him from puppyhood to bark whenever a stranger appears on the premises. Serious Accident. While driving home on Monday evening last, at about six o’clock, accompanied by his wife and daughter, Mr E. Corbett, of the Ashburton Forks, met with a nasty accident. When about half-way across the Ashburton bridge the backhand from some cause or other broke, and the vehicle coming to the ground caused the horse to plunge violently. The occupants were precipitated somewhat heavily to the ground, and under the - circumstances it is surprising that more serious results did not follow. As it was, however, Mrs Corbett’s arm was dislocated, besides other painful injuries, and Mr Corbett, who fell on his shoulder, has some nasty bruises. Miss Corbett luckily escaped unhurt, with the exception of a severe shaking. Under Dr Trevor’s care Mrs Corbett is progressing favorably, and although at first her injuries were likely to lead to serious results, we are pleased to learn this morning that she is in a fair way to recovery.

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Bibliographic details

Ashburton Guardian, Ashburton Guardian, Volume III, Issue 668, 21 June 1882

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Ashburton Guardian Ashburton Guardian, Volume III, Issue 668, 21 June 1882

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