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Kissing.

For words, -always unsafe in woman's nt r >uths, kissing was (according to tKe Monitor”) substituted for the concealment of their thoughts. In its prime, the music of kissing can only be compared to many things more or, less enchantitig and romantic. The chief thing in kissing appea s to be to hang on as long as possible, and drop each other with a crash. A sigh like a whirlwind, thrown in at the end., is- a proof of appreciation, and a signal for an encore, The fondness for kissing is attributable to tho ladies’ taste-for fooling around the ends of the young men’s moustaches, and to the young men’s ambition to have the growth of their moustaches so encouraged ; the appltofti of a red-haired girl to the beardless jjps of a backward youth has a stimulating s effect equal to that of a hot-house ; danger only lurking iii their too frequent repetition. Kissing comes as natural to a girl as a cunning fly to a bald head. A ii(an slides as awkwardly into his first kisa'aa into his older brother's tailcoat, and his vanity is equally great on both occasions, lie considers them as stops up the ladder o: lif--, and would have 'us promotions pyocl.ai mod from the housetops and shouted from the church steeples, but such is hia modesty ip hia family circle, thjp. whgp A younger brother quietly mentions them, he looks red and feels unfratcrnal. ; The female sex obtain their remarkable profleienoy in kissing by perpetual study and constant practice. They arc early distinguished for their aptitude in the art, :or what girl is not ready to kiss a baby at all hours mid all seasons ! This sort ofkias, gradua'ly developedinto the 'embryo kiss, affected by school girls' and female"companions, and finally into the kiss'of the regular lovers—intense, passionate, and very nice to contemplate upon a starlit night. “ Oft in the stilly night ” may the sound be heard, an 1 when sounding curt from tho end of a passage,' it may safely bo concluded that the clovi- will presently bang and footsteps bo heard retreating; and that Jenny will appear with her collar ruffled, and cigar ash upon her shoulder. One tiling be careful of, aa you value your reputation fop respectability : don’t kiss a girl in the dark, unless you can depend upon the sp >t where the pins protrude ; a sudden jab with one of these will spoil the best-intenti-med kiss ever bestowed on a pretty girl.

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Permanent link to this item

https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/newspapers/AG18791225.2.20

Bibliographic details

Ashburton Guardian, Ashburton Guardian, Volume I, Issue 39, 25 December 1879

Word Count
415

Kissing. Ashburton Guardian, Volume I, Issue 39, 25 December 1879

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