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A Juryman’s Grievance.

“ Well, gentleman, have yon decided upon your . verdidt ?’.V asked a country 1 " judge the other day, as the jury returned \ to the box. “ Did I understand fchaV-tha prisoner's name was Brown—-T. K. Brown?” asked the foreman, gloomily, “It is.” “ Then we bring in a verdict, of * murder in the first degree,” and the foreman rubbed his hands with an expression ' of horrible satisfaction. “ But this isn’t a murder case,” said the astonished judge; “ this is an action to recover insurance. What on earth do you mean V' “ Don’t, make any difference,” growled the fore--man. “My name is Brown too—T. K.: Brown—and for the last four years some: unprihcinled wretch of the same surname has had his washing done at the laundry I' patronise. The result is that , every now and than I find some of my silk embroidered handkerchiefs and shirts gone, and in hlace of them about the worstlooking lot of old rags on record—things mixed, vou see. “Well, but ’.’ l ,‘X know what you are going to say, but that .ain't the point. The B-own a 1 ways takes back t.ic things of _ his I return. Ohi y<« ; but’ he freezes oh to 'my garments like a mud turtle to a worm.” “ Notwithstanding which—■ —” “I wouldn’t hal minded it bo much, but the cold-blooded appropriator always k eps posted as to when I change my laundry woman, laud" the next week follows with his wash too. Why, I’ve been clear round .to all--the wash-houses in the city six times already--—this fellow after me, like a sleuth-, hound.” Jleally, Mr. Foremap, this is all very well, but ” “I even went so far, your Honor, as to change my name—k actually had all my underclothes - marked Gnngleberg—Julius G. G a nglehorg—fust think of it—but what did this . wretch do but find it out, and change his’n, and before I knew it he had .gathered-in six more brand-new undershirts, and a set of pojatnas. It’s in) use recommending him to mercy. I’ve explained the whole thing to the jury, and they,all agree that he ought to be hanged before simrino to-morrow, if the sheriff can fix the things in time.” And there was a universal roar of indignation from the sympathetic spectators r as the judge ordered a new trial, and put the foreman under heavy bond to keep the peace. '

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Permanent link to this item

https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/newspapers/AG18791225.2.19

Bibliographic details

Ashburton Guardian, Ashburton Guardian, Volume I, Issue 39, 25 December 1879

Word Count
394

A Juryman’s Grievance. Ashburton Guardian, Volume I, Issue 39, 25 December 1879

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