THE WAY UP.

Sun (Christchurch), Volume I, Issue 140, 20 July 1914, Page 5

THE WAY UP.

NOTES FOB CLIMBERS. WHAT IS A TEA BASIN f Many novels and plays have been "based on the efforts of aggressive people to make some social advance, but there has been no serious text-book on how to get into London Society. Now, however, such a book has been written. In "The Ways of Society," Mrs Danvers Delano tells the aspirant exactly what must be done. First, it is necessary to take a a fashionable neighbourMrs Delano writes: — ''You must quit your comfortable suburban house, for the reason that you are too unknown to remain there. Be advised into taking a house in a good situation at all costs, for the proverbial crib in Mayfair or Belgravia is much more to the point than a pretentious mansion far out. The kind of house to take is one in a fashionable square. To be sandwiched between the aristocracy is quite a good beginning, and may prove an opening and -result in social advancemeat." THE USE OP THE BABY. The next step appears to be to send your young children into the Park: "Nurses and governesses often fraternise in the gardens, and the children begin; a friendship which sometimes leads t<| their attending the same finishing school.'' As soon as possible a ball must be given, though Mrs Delano cannot guaranlee that it will always be successful. To prepare you for disappointment, she says frankly that, though you may spend mbney like water, those attending your dance will not even pretend to know you a few weeks afterwards. The great thing is to avoid making the mistake of inviting people yourself. You must hand over the sending out of invitations to a "lady promoter," and you must not interfere in any way or try to smuggle in one or two of your friends. Mrs Delano is severe on this point: '/When a lady is inviting the guests f#r you, remember to be. a cipher in her hands. One of the many difficulties is that her friends and. yours do not dovetail, -so with many qualms and regrets you will. have to omit to invite your oldest friends and thereby cause them many heartburnings, for it is essential the right sort of people should be seen at your maiden effort.'' THE LADY INVITER.

Some may think that snobbery could go no further, but the reader must take a lesson from the author's revelation of what once happened when hostess was indiscreet enough to invite , a few of her friends and to disagree with the lady promoter. Hefe is Mrs Delano's " account of how "the right sort of people ?' behavp:-p;, "A ball Was given in' a well-known square for which. lady ,of title consented to invite' thte girests. I do not profess to know- what happened. • but suffice it to say? hostess and lady fell •out just before; o:The' - entertainment swayed 4n the balance, and by the evening in question they, were not on speaking terms. The lady arrived and took nj> her. poMtioil- 8n evidence sit'^ie I 'top 'of' the stairs. Smiting and : she welcomed her friends in such a manner that in ten minutes no one realised , whose ball it was; the; host : aiid'' io&t'G&s were swept away and *in the seething crowd. To put it ;tne supper-room was besiegM, ;stormed, and when the poor host, tired weary of struggling, endeavoured his way to Ms supper tabfe,. ail . that .could be found was a chicken carcass and the remains of a tumbleTdown. jelly." It is to.be feared, too, that his exertions 'may have had .no results. Mrs Delaio does not wish to raise the unhappy man's hopes too high: "Those, you entertain do not always ask you in return, unless you surpass others in lavishness, which may possibly insure you an invitation to an afternoon 'at home.' " POINTS ON PRECEDENCE.

■On no account must you omit to study some table of precedence. To show what appalling: things can happen if you do not know exactly who should have the place "of honour, Mrs Delano tells a story: "It is generally understood that the bride in whose honour the dinner is given takes precedence, and so she would on an ordinary'{occasion,- but not when anyone of highier rank is present. The dinner in question Was given to welcome a local baronet and his bride. A lady in her own right, the wife of a clergyman, was also bidden, but, unfortunately, the host gave his arm to the bride and seated her on his right hand; thus the 'daughter of a thousand earls found her rightful place usurped. Instantly the fat was in the fire, and in the end the JJerald's Office was appealed to." It is essential that you should know how to write a letter of invitation. Here is the authors formula:

Dear Mrs We shall be so pleased if you and Mr Jones will dine with u3 quietly on the 19th, at 8 o'clock. Yours sincerely, It is just that you may be forgiven if you drop an occasional hj, but you will be barred for ever if you speak of a slop-basin as a slop-basin. Mrs Delano leaves no room for doubt on this: i 1 We never speak of a slop-basin nowadays—we always call it a tea-basin. It would quite stamp us if we called it a slop-basin.'' The position is too painful to contemplate.—London "Daily News."