THE GENTLEST ART.

Sun (Christchurch), Volume I, Issue 132, 10 July 1914, Page 6

THE GENTLEST ART.

THE SURREPTITIOUS BIBLIOPHILE [Written for THE SUN.] Of course the first idea that comes with the mention of the gentlest art is an idea of the art of making love, but that, really, is by no means the gentlest art. It is true that it can be accomplished with all the delicacy of flyfishing, but it so seldom is—it is more often conducted furioso, and amongst some people it is accomplished with a club.

No! The gentlest art is the gentle art of book-borrowing, which, to be done really successfully, with pleasure and without hurt to the lender, .must be done with finesse. Supposing your friend owns a rare edition which you feel you must have —there is small satisfaction in entering his'house at midnight, and filching the book from .the library shelves—it is not sport, it is like catching fish with dynamite. There are many ways of borrowing books, and with a really enthusiastic and suspicious collector the excitement becomes intense. A friend I had once, before he borrowed some of my books, was in the habit of entering the library of the unwilling lender, getting him to look up some abstruse matter in an encyclopaedia or 'other work of reference, and, while be was so engrossed, hiding the coveted volume beneath his-coat-tails. But, then, he was a politician and a bibliophile, and with such folk it is only the end that counts, the means signify nothing. Now, with the true book-borrower, the means is the thing. The Method Provocative.

The true book-borrower has many devices for overcoming the innate suspicion of the collector. Having located the book, he desires, he may glance at it with interest, take it down and examine it with indifference developing into contempt, and then, thrusting it carelessly back into the shelves, say that it is a very inferior copy-—and. that neither the type impression nor the plates compare. in any way with a friend's copy of • the same edition. Of course, the collector argues, and the borrower, with a cunning simulation of earnestness, seizes the book, saying that he will borrow it for a day just to compare it with the friend's copy. In vain the collector protests that he doesn't want it compared, for the borrower very cleverly makes as though to return the book, and asks why, if the collector knew it to be an inferior copy, he didn't say' so at first. Then the collector's indignation overcomes his discretion, and the borrower marches off with the book—another trophy of the chase for his collection.

The Deceptive Method. Another good method is to enter the library of the collector with a couple of old books under one's arm. Old books, such as volumes of sermons, which from outside inspection 'look as though they might possibly be rarities, can be bought for a few pence from any second-hand book-seller. The game is to enter eagerly with the battered volumes, say one has picked them up for a song at a sale (with every reason for believing them to be anonymous works by Shenstone or Moore or some other long-dead and reputable author), and keep on until the collector's curiosity has been thoroughly aroused. A strong grip must be kept on the volumes all the while, as though one were suspicious of the collector's intentions, and care must be taken to work him up to the point of demanding an inspection of the find. Tliis can frequently be managed by judicious disparagement of one's own learning and praise of the collector's bibliographical knowledge. When he has made the demand one must consent very reluctantly, and before handing them over seize the desired book from the collector's shelves with the remark that this will serve as a hostage until the priceless volumes are returned. It is advisable to make an exit at once, while the collector is making his first feverish search through the worthless volumes for dates, watermarks, and other internal evidence. . In a case such as this, delays are dangerous. The Sick Friend Method.

Less subtle methods are the sick friend trick and the exchange method. In the first method one sets eyes on the rare A olume with a cry of glad surprise. "How fortunate," one exclaims, "just the very bdok that Harry was Avishing to read, poor fellow." Then, in answer to the collector's look askance, one adds gently that Harry, poor fellow, is a friendly bibliophile at present very weak in a convalescent home, and has expressed a wistful desire to read that very book. Usually the collector is up to this trick and falls over himself in his anxiety to prove that he has already promised that book to another person. But the borrower looks upon the collector Avith pity mingled Avith scorn, and explains that his friend is a sick friend. Few men can bear eA T en an implied accusation of callous inhumanity, and the odds are that the collector will weakly consent to the loan, and the borroAver has already another scalp. A Risky Trick.

The exchange method is eA-en more risky, but is still preferable to a straight-out demand or midnight' purloining, though it is not more artistic. The method of operation is to again enter the collector's library, breeziugly this time, and say, "Oh! I believe you have such and such a book; I will lend you such and such' a book if you will lend me this for a while." ' With that you pick up the book and invite the collector to come with you and get the hostage. It is not etiquette for collectors to snatch their books hands of borroAvers, and so the collector usually, comes along. In working this trick one should be careful not to work it on a collector on Avhom one has made a preAious levy, and it is always best to promise him some book that one does not possess. Then, when he enters, we can always remember with regret that the promised book was lent to a man named Robinson last week. But this trick is also dangerous, for exasperated collectors have been known to snatch one's most treasured trophies in revenge and bolt with them. It is safest to run quickly up the steps with the book ami slam the door before the collector can enter —then there is nothing left for him to do but to call the police, and collectors rarely do that.

THE BORROWER'S EXD. Some borrowers have improved oil these.methods, yet these are the basic examples, and it is sad to reflect that so few book-borrowers are in gaol. The guise of friendship in this case baffles the law. But it is believed that on a, great many book-borrowers retribution descends at last —they end their days as second-hand book dealers and die miserably, tortured with remorse and •visions) silently condemnatory, of bereft collectors. D. H.