THE PLEASANTRIES OF FOOTE.

Otago Witness, Issue 1456, 11 October 1879, Page 24

THE PLEASANTRIES OF FOOTE.

The following are amongst the many anecdotes told of the witty actor Foote, styled the English "Aristophanes":— Being in company one evening with two dignitaries of the church, the conversation chanced to turn on some polemical points in divinity; and the two churchmen, with considerable warmth, took different sides of the argument. During the clerical combat, Poote took no other part in the dispute than to fill their glasses, in order to enable nature to sustain the unusual exertion. At last one of them turned to Foote, and begged that he would take part, as he could sometimes be as argumentative as he could be witty. "Not I," replied Foote, "I make it a rule never to meddle in family affairs." Foote had a wonderful capaoity lor mimicking the natural failings and peculiarities of others, and often took unwarrantable liberties with persons. Amongst these was General Smith, whom he introduced into his comedy of "The Nabob" under the name of Sir Matthew Mite. One day the general sent for Foote. " Sir," said he, " I hear you have an excellent turn for mimicry, and I find that I, among others, have been the subject of your ridicule." " Oh !" said Foote gaily, " I take all my acquaintances off at times— and, what i 8 more wonderful, I often take myself off." " Pray, let me have a specimen," said the general. Foote put on hiß hat and gloves, took his cane, made a bow, and retreated from the house without saying another word Foote was once met by a friend in town with a young man who was flashing away very brilliantiy, while Foote Beemed grave. " Why, Foote," said his friend, " you are flat to-day ; you dent seem to relish wit .'" "Hang it!" said Foote, "you have not tried me yet." Quin could overthrow even Foote, At one time they had had a quarrel and were reconciled, but Foote was still a little piqued. "Jemmy," said he, " you should not have Faid that I had but one shirt, and that I lay in bed while it was washed." "Saimny," replied the actor, "I could not have said so, for I never knew that you had a shirt to waßh."

Foote, dining one day with Lord Townsond who had. recently fought a duel, and finding that the wine was bad, and the dinner vilely cooked, remarked that he was surprised his lordship had called hiß antagonist out, when he could have disposed of him in a much easier way. " How ?" wjked Lord Townsend,

" Why," replied Foote, "you should have given him a dinner like thic, and so poisoned him."

One of Footo's pleasantries upon paying debts occura in " The Lame Lover, "in which one of the characters tells this story: —

One morning a Welsh coachmaker came with hi? bill to my lord, whose name was un. luckily Lloyd. My lord had the man up. "You are called, I think, Mr Lloyd ?" " At yonr lordship's service, my lord."

" What, Lloyd with an L !" "It was with an L, indeed, my lord." " Because in your part of the world I have heard that Lloyd and Floyd were synonymous, the very same names." "Very often, indeed, my lord." "But you always spell yours with an L ?"

" Always."

" That, Mr Lloyd, is. a little unlucky ; for you must know I am now paying my debts alphabetically, and in four or five years you might have come in with an F ; but lam afraid I can give you no hopes for your L. Ha, ha, ha !"

WnENthe mind and body are tired by over-exertion or by long study, ft bath, in which nan been mixed a half-bottle of Murray and Lanman's Florida Water, will reinvigorate the physical poweri, and impart a delightful buoyancy and clearness to the mind. To prevent disappointment, always ask for the Florida Water prepared by Lanman & Kemp, New York, there being worthless counterfeits, possessing none of the above properties.— [Advt.]

Bristol's Sahsaparilla is a perfoct specific in Rheumatism. No matter how long the person may have had the disease, or how severe it may be, Bristol's Sareaparilla will cure it.— [Advt.]

Advice to Mothers ! — Are you broken in your rest by a siok child suffering with tho pain of cutting teeth ? Go at once to a chemist and fret a bottle of Mrs Winslow's Soothing Syrup.. It will rel eve the poor sufferer immediately. It is perfectly harmless and pleasant to taste, it produces natural, quiet Bleep, by relieving the child from pain, and the little cherub awakes "a3 bright a3 a button.' It, soothes the child it Boffcebs the gums, allays all pain, relieves wind, regulates the bowels, and is the best known remedy for dysentery and diarrhffia, whether arising from teething or other causes. Mrs Winslow's Soothing Sy/up is sold by medicine dealers everywhere at Is l§d per bottle. Manufactured at 493 Oxford street London.— | Advt.]

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