It is Town Talk

Free Lance, Volume I, Issue 36, 9 March 1901, Page 22

It is Town Talk

— That a lot of boots, sold as Fiench and English, are really made in this colony. — That a Maon, uho claims to be the Messiah, has bioken out in the Haw kes Bay district. — That "Deadwoow Dick" and "Buffalo Bill" are becoming very popular over Blenheim way. — That a lady in bloomers rode through the Hutt in the masculine fashion the other day. — That the new Yankee notion foi piolonging life — the salt craze — has caught on in Wellington. — That a certain disappointed individual now teims English titles and baubles "Imperial tinwaie." — That the uncle of a Wellington girl had to pay up for a bike recently, which she obtained by false pretences. — That the people who give you two and sixpenny samples of the future are as numerous as ever in this city. — That two local Society belles are "utter strangers" since one of the tw ain sneenngly told the other it was reported she got her complexion from a chemist in Willis-street.

-That an oblique-eyed Chow is said to have been the disturbing element in a lecent domestic quarrel at Te Aro - That the first artist who comes in the cinematograph way with views of Queen Victoria's funeral will stuke a bonanza --That, while a petticoated crowd waited at a local church to see a wedding lately, the couple got married at a pin ate house That the police lwue had a delicate 1 lob trying to diseovoi the mother ot the superfluous infant abandoned on Clydo(|iiav last week That women folk seemed to pay moi o attention to the gaily-caparisoned Indian soldiers than they did to the Im penal Tommies. That a well known local Irishman was firm in his decision that the Imperial tioops le&embled our "thraps." Are ye listening Kelly P — That somebody down at Oamaru is advertising for a strong boy "to cook and milk a cow." Rather a novel feat to milk roast beef. - -That Haw era Hospital lias just come in for a testamentary bequest running into four figures. No four-figure benefactors down this way. ---Thot Road-king Billy Thomson's many fi lends will be glad to hear that he lias returned ironi the Transvaal Willy, they have missed you. —That an aristocratic pauper, wellknown here, has at last tired of waiting foi the lemittanee that was due twenty years ago, and is now rouscabout on a "faw m." — That the «ay sheep and cattle are ti ncked and shipped, and the length of tune thc\> aie kept without sustenance, should receive the attention of the S.P.C.A. Societies tlnoughout the colony

— That the spiritual neglect of the Maoris is troubling a Wairarapa parson, who says that the only laymen who mix with them are Mormons. - That one M.H.R. is in favour of the mumcipalisation of the burying business — the adoption of a similar system to that in vogue in Paris. — That Postmaster-General Ward refuses to make known how many letters aie posted annually to the Hobart sweopist. And why should hhpc p -That McNab's Gardens are undoigoing extensive improvements, and will be re-opened about the end of May with a free afternoon entertainment. —That a local woman lately left for Australia to get thoroughly coached up in spiritism and other forms of ghostly science, with a view to making a living thereat. — That country selectors who subscribed so liberally to send Contingents away have conjointly lost a large sum through being unable to get men to cut their crops, etc. — That an individual who teaches the young idea how to shoot on Sundays is now the owner of a blue-blooded racehorse, which came his way owing to an unmet bill-of-sale. — That Wellington has been unusually full of visitors lately, and the latest pag, "What ' are you going away with the Contingent, too ?" has made some old bald-heads wild. — That a local pedagogue says he had no idea profanity was, so prevalent till he began to ride the bicycle. Nearly everyone he has run into so far has made cursory remarks. —That up to last week the Federation Commissioners had examined 85 witnesses, of whom 27 gave a straightout rote for federation, and 4u against it, while the other 13 "dunno where they are."

—That Mr. Alfred Baldwin, of Chn&tchurch, is steadily coming to the front with that tenor voice of his. — That a resident of the city has just brought over a fine parrot from Sydney. It is an educated bird, and swears mo&t fluently in French. — That dire misfortune has recently caused a townsman, who has over w orn the blue ribbon of a rumlets life, to deviate from the path of rectitude. — That a well-known par&on, travelling incog., had a great time the other clay with a gang of spielers, who were returning from a country race-meet-ing. They thought he was one of themselves. — That a waiter, who died the other day expressed the quaint wish that t serviette and a bill-of-fare should be buried with him. The cost of his funeral, and a good deal more, was found in a pickle bottle. — That woman's rights are coming home to her. Last week an order was made upon a Christchurch lady for the maintenance of her destitute hubby. In happier days he had settled his property upon his wife. — That a certain up-country paper is busy just now with explanations touching its latest item of news, viz., "The deceased bore an accidental character, and the jury returned a verdict of excellent death." — That a smart youngster came to light out at Newtown last week. Asked to name New Zealand's chief export he promptly replied "Contingents/ and scored hcavilv. He knew the Park was full of that kind of produce. —That the native officers of the Indian Contingent receive an extra allowance of a sovereign a day during their slay in the colonies, the non-commis-sioned officoi s iv& a day, and the British officers a a day.