POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXXVI, Issue 127, 25 November 1938, Page 8

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

BY PERCY FLAGE

If all the votes of confidence in defeated party leaders were laid end to end nobody would be itny the better off. * « » According to a high authoriiv. this country has a New Deal, but what lots of people want to know is, were tha cards impartially shuffled. « * * Germany protests against her people * having to live with Jews in other countries. The Jews feel that way, too. * * • Coventry Patmore. very . distressed at the reception of his first book of poems, bought up the remainder of the edition and burnt it. What a poet! . , * * *. An international congress on refri* geration is to be held in Wellington in 1940, it is reported. In our Centennial innocence we would suggest holding the congress this "summer." THE O'HOGAN. * » • ■ . THE "OFFICE." Thought you were bound to comment on Half and Half ridden by W. Shand(y) winning a race at Invercargill (!) last weekend. Would hot like to say W. is the initial for weak! ■.''-- X, •it * * ; SUPERMEN. Dear Percy Flage,—At a time whin the world is afflicted with a surfeit of supermen one could wish that they might spare a minute to brood over a few words of Fontenelle's: "Nature intends that, at fixed periods, men should succeed each other by the instrumentality of death. We shall never outwit Nature; we shall die as usual.* And if the wind blows any hardef we'll begin to dislike Wellington. With best wishes— R.I.P. Lower Hutt. * * * PATENTED PLANTS. "Highly Interested'^ (Wadestown) rang us last evening asking for further particulars (if any) of America's patented plants. Included in the variety of plants for which patents have been taken out are a thornless barberry, an almost thornless rose, a golf-green grass, a mushroom, carnations, freesias, lilies, dahlias, violets, strawberries, blackberries, raspberries, sugar cane, an almost black rose, a giant pansy with stems two and a half to four feet high and flowers three to four inches in diameter, giant grapes, and an orange that looks like a lemon. Harold L. Ickes, Secretary of the Interior, invented and patented a "won't fade" dahlia that retains its coral red colour, on the bush or when cut, until the very end. Luther Burbank, who would have earned millions had there been a plant patent, law in. his lifetime, spent nineteen years in perfecting his amaryllis. He grey/ over 65,000 hybrid bushes before he^ developed his white blackberry. Plant patent No. 1 was granted on August 18, 1931, to a New Jersey landscape architect, for a new variety of ever-bloom-ing, clinging rose. ; « . « ■* ■* BRAIN-TEASER. Answers to last Saturday's problems:' (1) 1671 months- with Aye. Sundays each, and (2) A.had'lte.'ld, B 8& Id, C 4s Id", D2s Id. Els Id, and, P 7d. Solvers: "Arsenic Arnold, Sen., "Blotto," "Jory," C.M.G., and W. ' Now for the equalogues: Here are the answers: v Hearthstone, fortune, dynamite, tallboy, watertight, /tarboy, paintpot. "Pearleen" had six right, "Arsenic Arnold, Sen." got full marks, so did "Hallelujah" and M-W.^ . R.J.W., who landed six out of the seven also, writes: It is strange that I should have "flunked" on No. 3 (dynamite). I have used plenty ofexplosives—this one included. Twentyeight years ago down the West Coast, when my mate's lamp dropped into a tin containing about 201b of compressed powder, I had tlie closest shave of my then young life; it took every hair off one side of me. A few years lateral had more experience with it, but there it was always encased in metal, winch made it more dangerous when it exploded. I got into the road of some more there and it left me more holy .than godly." • Now, twenty Tears after, when I want to forget the d- d stun, you have to bring such a dangerous substance into Col. 8. . . "Blotto" has sent us a collection oi equalogues for tomorrow. Several ox them have already been done in this column, but the rest will be published, along vyith one or two others of ?ur own. Watch out. * - '* *, NURSERY RHYME. (Revised Version.) Bye, Baby Bunting, Father's busy "punting Down at Kempton Park; ' Mother's flown to Cairo / In her autogiro— . Aptly named "The x Lark. w But your faittfful Nannie, Wise and kind and canny, Watches o'er her lamfc Rosy little Janet, On the sands of Thanet, Sleeping in her pram. Bye, Baby Bunting, Father's treasure-hunting Somewhere in Peru. Mum's in the Canaries, Rearing cassowaries Brought from Timbuctoo, Meanwhile Baby Bunting, Heedless of the stunting Of her sire and dam, . Safe in Nannie's keeping Still continues sleeping Soundly in her pram. C.L.O, London "Sunday Times." * * * MAN'S SIMPLICITYDear Percy Flage,—Here's a few odd facts depending upon the simplicity of human nature for your column:— A publisher, in the United States, whose sales were slack, advertised a volume which he advised every girl over the "age of sixteen to purchase. It cost one dollar, and he got rid of over 100,000 before the police paid ia visit to his office and demanded to be shown the volume. The publisher produced a well-bound copy of the Bible. ,: , . , After writing a note explaining why he was taking his own life, William Gues picked up a bottle labelled "poison" and drank the contents. But unknown to him, .the /toottle contained* only distilled water. At the inquest it was proved that the man had died from heart failure. Similar to the above is the case of the man who fell asleep in church. His wife hit him on tfce back of th<t neck."with a hynjn book.to awaken him and he feU forward dead. She said at ihe inquest that her husband had been dreaming that he was being executed and she hit him, just as the axe fell." Unfortunately, she couldn't explain how'she knew what he ,was dreaming. An 18-year-old buy named Donald Duck has been discovered living in North Dakota, U.5.A... and he-.was-christened by a pastor called tne fcer, A. Henn. sua*