MISCELLANY.

Daily Southern Cross, Volume I, Issue 26, 14 October 1843, Page 4

MISCELLANY.

Passing Bills in the House of Commons. —The occasional visitor of the House cannot but be struck with the art and mystery of law-making as developed in what is called i the "preliminary business." Last month I said something of the ceremony of presenting petitions, which has all the outward show j and resemblance of mockery, though doubt- } less it has some innate virtue of which the initiated are aware. A few words now upon even more important business. When I entered the House, I found Sir H. Douglas, whom I sfew admitted a member on the cornlaw night, now in the centre of the throng of legislation. He stood at the bar with a pile of papers at his right hand on a little table, of which there is one at each side as one passes through the body of the House. — Sir Howard Douglas," shouted the speaker from the chair.— "A bill, Sir," answered Sir Howard. — " Please bring it up," exclaimed the Speaker. Up walks Sir Howard, and places the bill in the hands of the Clerk of the House, returning again himself as quickly as possible to his former station at the bar. Mumble, mumble, went the Clerk, making believe to read the title,- or a part of the title of the bill, but no one, I suppose, could tell what he said. All the time the buzz of private talk was going on in the House, the Speaker's voice pre dominating in such words these,— "That this bill be read a first time," — buzz, buzz. " Contrary opinion say no ; ayes have it." " That this bill be read a second time"— buzz, buzz— "say aye ; contrary opinion say no. The ayes have it," Buzz, buzz.—" Sir Howard Douglas," again shouts the Speaker. — "A bill, Sir," again answers Sir Howard, and so the whole ceremony was gone through three times, and I was aware that three bills (private bills no doubt) had passed through two of their stages : but though I had the honour of "assisting," as the French say, at their first and second reading, I can most truly aver that I know no more of the purport of tlio said bills than I do of tho pope's opinion concerning the number of tumbler's of whisky punch which it is lawful far a man to drink on St. Patrick's day, when it happens to fall on a Friday in Lent. — Dublin University Magazine, Sleep and Death.— The Angel of Slumber and the Angel of Death, locked in each other's arms, wandered over the earth. It was evening. They reclined upon a hill-side, and the habitations of men were not far off. A sad stillness pervaded the air, and the evening-bell was hushed. Still and silent as was their manner, the two beneficent genii of mankind reposed in a mournful embrace, and night came rapidly on. Then the angel of slumber arose from his mossy couch,^ and softly scattered from his hand the invisible slumber seeds. The wind of night wafted them to the quiet dwellings of the wearied husbandman ; and forthwith sweet sleep descended upon me inhabitants of the cottages, from the grey-haired sire to the cradled infant. The sick man forgot his pains — the unhappy man his sorrows — the poor man his cares — every eye was closed. And now, his benign labours being ended, the kind angel of slumber again lay down by the side of his thoughtful brother, and said cheerfully,— "When the red morning awakes then will mankind bless, me as their friend and benefactor. Oh, how sweet is it to do good unseen and in secret I How delightful is our duty!" Thus spake the frjendly angel of slumber. — The angel of death looked upon him with a silent sorrow ; and a tear, such as mortals shed, gathered in his large dark eyes, "Alas!" said he, that I cannot, like thyself, rejoice in their gratitude .! The earth j calls me her enemy, and the disturber of her peace."— " My brother," replied the angel ] of slumber, "will not the good, when they awaken, own thee as their friend and benefacter ? and will they not bless thee ? Are j we not brothers, and messengers, of our| Father ?" Thus they spake. The eye of the death-angel sparkled, and he clasped his brother more fondly in his embrace. — Krummacher's Parables.

"Doing" a Barber. — An Eastern Shoreman stepped into a barber's shop in Baltimore, XL S., and requested him to take off 10i cents. ' worth of hair. The barber trimmed his locks very neatly, and then combed and brushed them in the most particular style. "Are you done," asked the Eastern Shoreman, as the barber removed the napkin from his neck. "Yes, Sir," returned the barber with a bow. — " Are you certain you took off elevenpence wortth?" — Yes, Sir," returned the former, "here's a glass: you can see for yourself." — Well," said the Eastern Man, " if you think you have got a 'levenpence worth off, I don't know as I have any use for it, and I hav'nt got no change ; so you may just keep the hair for your trouble." The Captain of a whale ship, in allusion to the severe climate and various privations suffered by the inhabitants of Spitzbergen, told one of them that he sincerely pitied the miserable life to which he was condemned. "Miserable!" exclaimed the philosophic savage, <f I have always had a fish-bone through my nose, and plenty of train oil to drink ; what more could I possibly desire ? ' New Monthly Magazine. The Town of Santa Cruz, in Teneriffe, is supplied with water by an aqueduct, the cost ! of constructing which, and keeping it in repair, is defrayed by a tax upon wine and spirits actually consumed in the town. Supposing the people of Santa Cruz to turn teetotalers, how would they get supplied with water ? — North British Advertiser. As a Phrenologist and his friend were conversing, the latter said to the former, — " Did it never occur to you to wrap on the head those who come to submit their skulls to your examination, by way of trying if they wore empty?" — "No," said the other, "it was not necessary, as, if they had any thing in their heads, they would never have come tome!" Let thy words be few, but advised ; forethink whether that which thou art to speak be fit to be spoken ; affirm no more than what thou knowest to be true ; and be rather silent than speak to an ill, or to no purpose. What is the best government ? — That which teaches us to govern ourselves. — Goethe. A Jewel or a Wife. — A Miss Charlotte Mitchell, of Georgia, recently appeared on her wedding-day dressed entirely of silk of her own manufacture — cap, gloves, stockings, and dress — equal to the best pongee. Girls, do you hear that ? Such a girl would be worth more to a young man just starting in the world than a thousand dollar farm, and a half a dozen pianos to boot. Really she is a wife worth having, and William Whattington, Esq., may think himself a fortunate man. — Bangor Whig. At a late duel in Kentucky the parties discharged their pistols without effect, whereupon one of the seconds interfered, and proposed that the compatants should shake hands ; to this the other second objected as unnecessary — "for," said he, their hands have been shaking this half hour." Real Knowledge. — There is no difference between knowledge and temperanco ; for he who knows what is good, and embraces it, who knows what is bad, and avoids it, is both learned and temperate. But they who know very well what ought to be done, and yet do quite otherwise, are ignorant and stupid. — Socrates.