SCRAPS.

Bush Advocate, Volume I, Issue 24, 30 June 1888, Page 2

SCRAPS.

Banns of marriage were first published in 1200. • Ne7er worry over . trouble. The trouble itself is misery enough. " What is your business V' " I feed the lions in a menagerie." " Must be dreary work." "On the contrary, it is very funny. They keep the table in a roar." Don't despise a man because he is poor. Yon can hire him a good deal cheaper than you could if he were well-to-do. The Rochester Express, noting that a Kansas woman worth a million dollars has married a hotel waiter, says that this is a good opportunity to bring in that axiom. " Everything comes to him who waits." "L; M. Thornton author of " The Postman's Knock," and other songs, died in Bath "Workhouse. Sara Bernhardt, when she entertains her friends at breakfast in her own home, sits on a- throne at the head of the table, under a splendid canopy, and wearing a regal robe. Fate moves with leaden feet, but strikes with iron hands. The Way a Class Complimented a Lady Visitor.— Lady Visitor to Scripture class ; " With what weapon did Samson slay his enemies ?" After a period of unbroken silence, fair questioner, touching her blooming cheek ; " What is this ?" Chorus ; " The jor-bone of a has, mum." " Patrick, you were on a bad spree yesterday." "Vis, Mr Ellis, I was. Bles^me, if I weren't a-layin' in the gutter wid a pig. Father Ryan came along, looked at me an' says he, ' One is known by the company they kape." " And did you get up. Patrick." 'No, but the pig did.' Grocer (to boy) — "What are you doing James ?" Boy—" Putting sand in the sugar." Grocer— "Well that won't do. You must ..put the sugar in .the sand, and then if a .costomer asks it we put sand in the sugar, you can say no. You will find, James, as you acquire more buisness experience, that in the long-run, truth always pays." A lady carrying an umbrella entered the street car but before she could take a seat the car jumped forward with an awkard j erk. The Jady i n attempting to retain her equilibrum, whacked her umbrella against the head of a gentleman. " Oh, sir, I beg a thousand pardons. These drivers are so careless. Hope you are not seriously injured, sir?" ''Oh no, ma'am. I'm a married man and am used to little knocks like that." Carlyle tells a story of one of the Lords of Session in Scotland, a Lord Justice-Clerk who lived in the beginning of this century — a strange, rough, gruff Judge, who used to take sketches of people in Court with pen and ink, One day he asked the usher,' " Wha's that man younder V " That's the plantiff, my lord." "Ou ! he's the plantiff, is he ? He's a queer-looking fellow. I think I'll decide against him and see how he'll look."